Symbols In the Likely Event Rebecca Yarros

The Engagement Ring Symbol in In the Likely Event – Meaning & Analysis

What Is the Engagement Ring?

The engagement ring is a diamond ring purchased by Nathaniel "Nate" Phelan about a year after his trip to Fiji with Izzy. In Chapter 26, he reveals that he picked it out and second-guessed it fourteen times. For nearly three years, he carries the ring taped to the inside of his dog tag, hidden beneath his uniform, on every mission that does not require sanitization. On a literal level, it is a piece of jewelry meant to symbolize a marriage proposal. On a symbolic level, it becomes a physical vessel for Nate’s hidden commitment, the couple’s ongoing struggle over timing and readiness, and the painful gap between love and circumstance.

Where Does the Ring Appear?

The ring first becomes visible to Izzy in Chapter 26 (New York, March 2015) when Nate, grief-stricken after burying his Special Forces friend Julian Torres, attempts to propose. Izzy refuses, believing he is not in his right mind. Nate then tapes the ring to his dog tag and keeps it concealed for the next three years.

It reappears in Chapter 25 (Kabul, August 2021) when, during a confrontation, Nate cuts the ring from the tag and sets it on the counter, revealing that he has carried it throughout their separation. In Chapter 29, Izzy retrieves the ring from the suite’s kitchen area and brings it to Nate’s room, using it as a catalyst for their reconciliation. Finally, in Chapter 31, Serena hands the ring (still taped to the dog tag) to Izzy on the evacuation plane, telling her that Nate said to wait for “when it is time to take your shot.”

The ring also echoes through its absence: in Chapter 15, Izzy removes her engagement ring from Jeremy, noting how light her finger feels without it, signaling her rejection of a loveless alliance.

How Does Its Meaning Change

The ring’s meaning evolves across four stages:

  1. Unseen Promise (Fiji to New York) – After Fiji, Nate buys the ring as a sign of hope for a future he believes is impossible. He keeps it hidden because he is not ready to ask Izzy to sacrifice her career for his military life.

  2. Rejected Plea (New York) – When Nate finally proposes, the ring represents a trauma-driven demand for an immediate choice. Izzy’s refusal transforms the ring into a symbol of their fundamental mismatch in timing: he is ready in crisis; she is not ready at all.

  3. Carried Grief and Love (Three Years in Kabul) – Taped to Julian Torres’s dog tag, the ring becomes a dual symbol: Nate’s enduring love for Izzy and his unresolved grief for his friend. It is a tangible weight he carries through every deployment, a reminder of what he lost (Izzy’s yes) and what he fears (more death).

  4. Reclaimed Hope (Kabul Reconciliation) – When Izzy picks up the ring in Chapter 29, she sees it not as a demand but as proof that Nate saw a future for them all along. By putting it on her right hand and later accepting it fully, she transforms the ring into a symbol of mutual commitment, finally aligned with her own readiness.

Character Connections

  • Nathaniel Phelan – The ring is his primary method of keeping Izzy psychologically close. He carries it through three years of separation, PTSD, and combat, using it as an anchor for his hope. It also connects him to Julian Torres, whose dog tag he slices to reveal the ring, showing how his love and his military sacrifice are intertwined.

  • Isabeau Astor – Izzy’s relationship with the ring mirrors her growth. She first rejects it because she cannot accept a proposal born from trauma; she later retrieves it because she understands the devotion behind the gesture. Her acceptance marks her readiness to choose Nate over her career and parental approval.

  • Jeremy Covington – As a foil, Jeremy’s engagement ring to Izzy represents obligation and political alliance. Izzy describes it as “obnoxious” and heavy; returning it in Chapter 15 frees her to pursue real love.

  • Serena Astor – Serena physically delivers the ring to Izzy at the airport, acting as the intermediary who ensures Nate’s promise reaches its destination.

  • Julian Torres – Though dead, Julian’s identity on the dog tag makes him a silent co-carrier of the ring. His presence underscores the theme of military sacrifice: Nate carries both his love and his grief.

Theme Connections

  • Fate versus Timing – The ring is a physical token of the “right person, wrong time” conflict. Nate believes fate brought him and Izzy together (the plane crash, the reunion in Kabul), but their lives are out of sync. The ring sits in his pocket for years, waiting for the right moment.

  • Love versus Duty – Nate’s duty as a Special Forces operator prevents him from proposing in a way that feels fair to Izzy. He buys the ring but cannot offer it until he is suicidal with grief, showing how military obligations distort his ability to express love.

  • Trauma Recovery – The ring is first offered while Nate is dissociating from Julian’s death. Later, in therapy (Chapter 32), he begins to heal. The ring’s eventual acceptance coincides with his decision to leave the military and seek help.

  • Communication and Miscommunication – Nate never explains why he carries the ring; Izzy misreads his proposal as a trauma response. The ring becomes a silent witness to their failure to speak openly. Only when Izzy confronts him with the ring in hand do they finally resolve the misunderstanding.

Study Questions and Answers

1. Why does Nate tape the ring to Julian Torres’s dog tag rather than leave it at home?
Answer: He wants the ring with him on every mission because it represents his commitment to Izzy, but he also fears losing it in the chaos of combat. Taping it to the dog tag of his dead friend keeps it physically close to his heart and symbolically connects his love for Izzy to his duty and grief. It also ensures the ring cannot be found or taken if his body is recovered, reflecting his fear of vulnerability.

2. How does Izzy’s perception of the ring change from the New York proposal to the Kabul confrontation?
Answer: In New York, she sees the ring as evidence that Nate is not thinking clearly—a trauma-driven proposal she must reject to protect both of them. In Kabul, after learning he carried it for three years, she realizes it was a genuine symbol of enduring love, not a momentary impulse. She picks it up and confronts him, using the ring to bridge their silence.

3. What does the ring reveal about the theme of readiness versus love?
Answer: Nate is ready to marry three years before Izzy, but his readiness is complicated by grief and a desire to give her a fair choice. Izzy is not ready until she has confronted her own pattern of seeking parental approval and realized that no one else compares to Nate. The ring physically represents the long gap between their emotional timelines.

4. How does the ring’s journey from Nate’s dog tag to Izzy’s right hand mirror the couple’s path to reconciliation?
Answer: The ring moves from hidden and secret (taped inside a uniform) to exposed (on the counter in Kabul) to willingly accepted (on Izzy’s finger). Each step mirrors their movement from miscommunication and separation to honest confrontation and finally to mutual commitment. The dog tag’s tape residue left on the ring keeps the memory of their painful years intact, even in their reunion.