Characters That Can Be Arranged Huda Fahmy

Huda's Mother in That Can Be Arranged: Character Analysis and Role

Overview

Huda’s mother is a quietly powerful presence in Huda Fahmy’s graphic memoir That Can Be Arranged. While she does not narrate or drive the story, her actions shape the courtship and wedding process. She is depicted as a traditional, hands-on parent who initially doubts the match with Gehad will succeed, yet she invests deeply in planning the religious ceremonies. Her character embodies the balance between family expectations, protective love, and trust in divine destiny (qadr). This analysis examines her role using explicit evidence from the book, distinguishing between factual events and interpretive observations.

Plot Role

Huda’s mother enters the narrative most directly during the courtship and wedding phases. She serves as a practical gatekeeper of Islamic customs: she requires that emails between Huda and Gehad be copied to her (playfully called “Chaperone’s Copy”), and later assigns Huda’s younger sister to read the long love letters when she cannot keep up. During the kitab (religious marriage contract ceremony) and walima (reception), Huda’s mother takes charge of all planning. “I didn’t care much for the actual wedding planning, so I let my mom take care of everything,” Huda notes in chapter 11. At the kitab, Huda surprises her mother by making a loud zaghrouta (ululation) entrance instead of acting demure, embarrassing her. The mother’s initial pessimism about the match—stated in the story outline from chapter 9, though not present in the provided excerpts—sets up a contrast with the eventual successful marriage.

Motivations and Traits Shown Through Actions

Huda’s mother is motivated by a blend of cultural tradition, religious duty, and maternal concern. She enforces chaperoned communication to uphold Islamic rules on gender interaction. Her decision to assign the sister as email reader shows she values oversight even when she lacks time. Planning the entire wedding demonstrates her commitment to family honor and community celebration. Her initial assumption that the match will fail likely stems from protectiveness: she wants Huda to avoid disappointment. The embarrassment at Huda’s zaghrouta reveals a preference for conventional decorum, yet she still allows Huda to make her own grand entrance—showing flexibility beneath her strict exterior. Overall, she is pragmatic, organized, somewhat skeptical, but ultimately supportive.

Chronological Arc

The mother’s arc moves from skepticism to full involvement. Before the match, she presumably raised Huda with the “rules” of gender relations described in chapter 3 (no dating, no physical contact, etc.). When Gehad appears, she is doubtful (outline, chapter 9). During the courtship in chapter 10, she supervises communication. By the kitab and walima in chapter 11, she is the chief planner. The wedding proceeds successfully, and Huda ends the book looking forward to life with Gehad—implying that the mother’s initial worry gave way to acceptance and joy. The divorce of Huda’s parents (mentioned in chapter 7) adds background; the mother may be especially invested in ensuring Huda’s marriage is stable.

Relationships

The mother’s relationship with Huda is warm but contains moments of tension. Huda delegates wedding planning to her, trusting her competence, but also rebels in small ways (the zaghrouta). The mother’s relationship with Gehad is filtered through her protective supervision; she likely approves of him after meeting him in person (implied, though not shown in evidence). With the younger sister, the mother delegates the email-reading task, showing she relies on family to maintain oversight. There is no direct evidence of her relationship with the father (who is divorced from her by chapter 7), but the divorce happened before the main story.

Key Decisions and Consequences

  • Assuming the match will fail: This decision, stated in the outline, probably stems from past experience or caution. The consequence is that Huda feels the need to take initiative to keep the relationship moving forward (chapter 9). It also creates a subtle motivational push for Huda to prove her mother wrong.
  • Assigning the sister as email reader: This ensures continued chaperonage but also reduces the mother’s direct involvement. It allows Huda and Gehad to write freely without the mother reading every detail, yet still maintains oversight.
  • Planning the entire wedding: By taking over, the mother relieves Huda of stress but also imposes her own vision. The consequence is a successful kitab and walima, but Huda recalls little of the reception due to the inexperienced photographer. The mother’s thorough planning likely contributed to the smooth execution.
  • Reaction to the zaghrouta: Her embarrassment is a momentary social discomfort, but she does not stop Huda. This demonstrates that she allows Huda’s individuality to shine, even if it breaks convention.

Theme and Symbol Connections

The mother connects to several themes from the book:

  • Arranged versus forced marriage: By supporting a chaperoned courtship and formal wedding, she embodies the voluntary nature of Islamic arranged marriage. She never forces Huda; she facilitates.
  • Family and community expectations: Her planning and initial skepticism reflect the weight of community opinion. The zaghrouta incident shows how Huda negotiates these expectations.
  • Self-worth beyond marriage: The mother’s doubt about the match implies that Huda’s worth is not defined by marriage success. Huda’s eventual happy marriage underscores that self-love (developed earlier in the memoir) mattered more.
  • Trust in divine destiny (qadr): Despite initial pessimism, the mother participates in the process, leaving the outcome to qadr. The successful match aligns with Huda’s earlier reflection that “it was qadr” (chapter 7).
  • Chaperoned courtship and modern tradition: The mother’s insistence on CCing emails and assigning a chaperone reader modernizes traditional rules, blending old customs with new technology.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. Why did Huda's mother assign her sister to read the emails between Huda and Gehad?
Explicit from chapter 10: the emails (love letters) were very long, and Huda’s mother “never had time to read them.” So she delegated to Huda’s hypervigilant younger sister to maintain the chaperone requirement.

2. How did Huda's mother react to Huda's zaghrouta entrance at the kitab?
Explicit from chapter 11: Huda says, “Much to the embarrassment of my mother, I walked in doing my own zaghrouta.” The mother was embarrassed by the unconventional, loud entrance.

3. What role did Huda's mother play in wedding planning?
Explicit from chapter 11: Huda states, “I let my mom take care of everything,” referring to planning the kitab and walima. She organized the bridal shower and bachelorette party as well.

4. Why did Huda's mother initially think the match would fail?
This is stated in the chapter 9 outline (not in provided text) but is part of the story: Huda’s mother was certain the match with Gehad would not succeed. Interpretation suggests she was being protective or realistic based on past experiences.

5. Does Huda's mother represent a typical Muslim parent in arranged marriages?
The author warns in chapter 1 that her experiences are personal and not to be generalized. However, within the memoir, the mother’s involvement—supervising courtship, planning the wedding, and initially doubting—reflects common elements of family participation in many Muslim communities. The story emphasizes that each family’s approach is unique.