Chapter 7: Qadr (Destiny) – Summary and Analysis
Spoiler Notice
This summary and analysis contain detailed information from Chapter 7 of That Can Be Arranged by Huda Fahmy. If you haven’t read the chapter and wish to avoid spoilers, please read the book first.
Summary
At 21, Huda considers herself a “future cat lady” after turning down the only real prospect she has ever had. She could have dated secretly but chooses not to go behind her parents’ backs, valuing their approval and their skill at weeding out unsuitable partners. Instead, she puts her trust in God and focuses on herself. She realizes she had been molding herself to be what a guy might like, and her own preferences had taken a back seat. After rejecting the stalkerish prospect, a fire ignites inside her: she starts to articulate what she truly wants in a partner and stops asking what is wrong with herself. Huda takes religious studies classes about love, family, and faith. Over the next four years, friends get married and divorced, her sisters marry, and her parents divorce. Despite growing self-love, she feels lonely. She signs up for a weeklong Islamic studies conference, not expecting to meet anyone. On the first day, she sees a man. She calls it qadr—destiny.
Key Events
- Huda turns down a prospect, the only real one she has had.
- She rejects the idea of dating behind her parents’ backs and chooses trust in God.
- She undergoes a personal transformation, learning to love herself and identify her own desires.
- Over four years, she witnesses friends marrying and divorcing, her sisters marrying, and her parents divorcing.
- Despite self-love, loneliness persists.
- She attends an Islamic studies conference without romantic intentions.
- On the first day, she encounters a man, and she recognizes it as qadr.
Character Development
- Huda Fahmy: Grows from passive self-doubt to active self-love. Early in the chapter she admits she would mold herself to please a man; after turning down the prospect, she finds her voice and clarifies her own needs. The loneliness that follows her parents’ divorce and friends’ life changes shows her continued vulnerability. Her decision to attend the conference reflects both intellectual curiosity and a desire to fill emotional emptiness. The final moment—seeing the man—indicates she is open to destiny without having sought it.
- Huda’s parents: Though not present in the scene, their divorce is mentioned, shaping Huda’s understanding of relationships and family.
- The prospect (unnamed): Represents a past choice that Huda ultimately rejects, catalyzing her self-discovery.
- The man at the conference: Appears only at the end, but his arrival is presented as fateful—qadr—which suggests he will play a significant role later.
Themes, Symbols, or Motifs
- Qadr (Destiny): The chapter’s title frames the meeting as divinely ordained. Huda’s trust in God throughout her years of waiting reinforces the Islamic concept that what is meant for one will come.
- Self-love vs. People-pleasing: Huda’s realization that she had been shaping herself for male approval is a key turning point. Her growth is measured by her ability to state her own desires and to stop asking “What’s wrong with me?”
- Loneliness and Community: Despite self-love, Huda feels lonely, especially as those around her marry and divorce. Her choice to attend a conference—a communal learning space—subtly bridges her personal solitude with the possibility of connection.
- Time and Patience: The four-year gap emphasizes that meaningful change and meeting the right person do not happen instantly. The chapter mirrors the traditional Islamic value of sabr (patience) in the context of finding a spouse.
Why This Chapter Matters
This chapter is a turning point in Huda’s journey. It completes her rejection of the unhealthy dynamics seen earlier (the stalker prospect) and establishes the emotional and spiritual foundation for the relationship that will follow. The theme of trusting God’s plan while working on oneself is central to the memoir’s message. The meeting at the conference, framed as qadr, introduces the love interest and sets up the remainder of the book.
Study Questions and Answers
1. Why does Huda decide not to date secretly behind her parents’ backs?
She values her parents’ approval and wants to avoid starting a relationship based on lies. She also trusts her parents’ judgment in weeding out unsuitable partners, and she puts her trust in God to bring the right person.
2. How does Huda change after turning down the prospect?
She stops molding herself to please men and begins to articulate what she actually wants in a partner. Instead of asking what is wrong with her, she focuses on self-love and takes religious studies classes. This shift marks the beginning of her authentic self‑definition.
3. What is the significance of the word qadr at the end of the chapter?
Qadr (destiny) signals that Huda sees the meeting as divinely ordained rather than coincidental. It reflects her belief that after years of patience and self‑work, God has brought her to this encounter. The term also ties the personal story to Islamic theology, reinforcing the memoir’s spiritual framework.