Characters The Things We Never Say Elizabeth Strout

Artie Dam: The Quiet Devastation of a History Teacher in The Things We Never Say

Overview

Artie Dam is a 57-year-old history teacher living on the Massachusetts coast. He is married to Evie and has a son, Rob. Outwardly cheerful and admired by students and colleagues, Artie conceals a profound despair that leads him to secretly plan his own suicide over the course of the novel. Elizabeth Strout reveals Artie through the eyes of others—Evie sees him as considerate but irritating; Flossie finds him lovely but dopey; Danny Marino initially finds him infuriating but later credits him with changing his life. This multiplicity of perspectives underscores the novel’s central theme: our inability to fully know another person.

Plot Role

Artie is the protagonist whose interior life drives the narrative. The story opens with his decision to kill himself, postponing the act only until Rob’s new relationship seems secure. After a near-drowning (chapter 2), Artie begins to confront the secrets he has carried: his wife Evie’s long‑held knowledge that Rob is not biologically his son, and his own failure to speak about the accident that killed Rob’s girlfriend Heather. Artie’s choices—to keep the paternity secret, to lie about the stolen comb, to confide in Ken Moynihan—form the emotional spine of the novel. By the epilogue, he dies of a heart attack, having abandoned his suicide plan and found a kind of peace on the water.

Motivations and Traits Shown Through Actions

Artie’s primary motivation is a desire to protect others from pain—even as his own loneliness grows unbearable. This is seen when he rejects violent suicide methods because the sight of an accident might harm innocent drivers (evidence, chapter 3). He also delays his plan until Rob’s new girlfriend Rachel is “a good one.” Artie’s deep sensitivity, largely hidden from his wife, emerges in small acts: defending Rhonda Lazarre from mockery, bonding with Danny Marino after catching him defacing a wall, and teaching the Holocaust with quiet intensity. His habits of avoidance—not confronting Evie about Rob’s paternity, lying about the comb—stem from a childhood marked by a mother’s psychotic episodes and a father’s dismissiveness. Artie thinks of himself as “not especially intelligent,” yet he is a gifted teacher who inspired a student to become a minister.

Character Arc

Artie’s arc moves from suicidal despair to a reluctant will to live, and ultimately to a quiet acceptance of mortality. In chapter 1, he experiences an obsessive fixation on dying, describing his existence as a “double life” in which he performs cheerfulness by rote. After being rescued from drowning, he denies any intention, but the event forces him into therapy and toward honesty. By chapter 7, sharing a laugh with Flossie—a laugh that is really a release of sorrow—marks the end of his suicidal thoughts. In the epilogue, though he grows listless and suffers a mental breakdown at school, he promises Evie he will not harm himself. His heart attack, while natural, mirrors the drowning he once considered; Danny Marino’s later question—did he kill himself?—is answered by Rob: “natural causes.” The ambiguity persists, but the text makes clear Artie had chosen to stay alive.

Relationships

  • Evie Dam (wife): A 34‑year marriage marked by unspoken secrets. Evie loves Artie but finds him irritating (his white socks, his refusal to accept praise). She has known for twenty‑eight years that Rob’s biological father is Reginald MacDonald, yet neither she nor Artie ever speaks of it. After his death, she discovers Reginald’s letter and later “canonizes” Artie as a saint.

  • Rob Dam (son): Artie loves Rob deeply and feels responsible for the accident that killed Heather. Rob perceives his father as “Jolly Artie,” an enigma he cannot quite reach. After Rob learns the truth about his paternity, Artie does not tell Evie, choosing instead to absorb the secret alone. Rob later confesses his role in Heather’s death, and Artie supports him unconditionally.

  • Ken Moynihan (friend): A fellow teacher and frequent dinner companion at Spud’s. Artie confides in Ken that Rob is not his biological son; Ken affirms their bond remains. Despite political disagreements (Ken supports the incoming president), their friendship endures.

  • Danny Marino (student): Initially a defiant teenager who mocks Rhonda and later vandalizes a wall. Artie catches him but refuses to report him, saying “I don’t blame you for wanting to say fuck you to the world.” This moment changes Danny’s life; he later becomes a teacher himself, crediting Mr. Dam.

  • Flossie (friend): Artie’s oldest friend, who confesses an affair and gets drunk at the New Year’s party. Their shared laughter in chapter 7 becomes a cathartic release that helps Artie let go of his suicidal plan.

Key Decisions and Consequences

  1. Planning suicide (chapter 1): Artie’s decision to end his life is motivated by loneliness and a sense that joy is unavailable. The plan is disrupted by his near‑drowning and Rob’s revelations.

  2. Keeping the paternity secret (chapter 3): After learning Rob is Reginald’s biological son, Artie chooses not to tell Evie—only to realize later that Evie has known all along. The consequence is a marriage built on mutual silence.

  3. Helping Danny Marino (chapter 5): Instead of reporting the graffiti, Artie helps Danny clean the wall and offers empathy. This act transforms Danny’s perception of adults and his own future.

  4. Confiding in Ken Moynihan (chapter 4): Telling Ken that Rob is not his biological son is Artie’s only voluntary admission of the truth. It strengthens their friendship and allows Artie to feel less isolated.

  5. Choosing to live (chapter 7): After laughing uncontrollably with Flossie, Artie abandons his suicide plan. The consequence is a return to life, though he later suffers a breakdown and eventually dies naturally.

Theme and Symbol Connections

  • Loneliness: The novel’s epigraph (Jung) defines loneliness as an inability to communicate what matters. Artie embodies this; his secrets and his false cheerfulness isolate him even in a crowded classroom.

  • Secrets and Lies: The central secret—Rob’s paternity—creates a web of omissions. Artie lies about the comb, about his near‑drowning, about his feelings. Strout suggests that unspoken truths both protect and destroy.

  • Free Will: Artie repeatedly ponders free will, especially after his near‑death dream. He tells Ken he is unsure whether his rescue was fate or choice. By the epilogue, he feels he cannot prevent his decline, yet he chooses not to take his own life.

  • Parenthood and Fatherhood: Artie’s relationship with Rob is defined by a biological falsehood, yet he remains a devoted father. His own childhood with a violent mother and a dismissive father shapes his need to be a protector.

  • Political Division: The novel’s background includes a contentious new presidency, protests, and a principal who commits suicide. Artie’s classroom becomes a refuge from division, though he grows weary of the world’s decay.

Artie’s love of sailing serves as a symbol of solitude and potential escape. In the epilogue, he finds peace only on the water, but the solace is temporary; the boat that could have carried him to his death instead carries him through two summers of quiet living.

Key Questions Answered

1. Why does Artie plan to kill himself?
Artie’s suicide plan stems from a deep, unnamed loneliness that intensifies after the accident and the discovery that he cannot feel joy. His mother’s comment about drowning children and his own obsessive thoughts drive him to see death as a release.

2. Does Artie ever tell Evie about Rob’s biological father?
No. Artie decides to keep the secret after Rob shows him the letter from Reginald. He later realizes Evie has known for twenty‑eight years, but they never discuss it.

3. What is the significance of Artie’s near‑drowning?
The near‑drowning is both a failed suicide attempt and a turning point. It forces Artie into the hospital, where he denies any intention, but it also triggers his confrontation with hidden truths and his eventual decision to stay alive.

4. How does Artie influence Danny Marino?
Artie’s refusal to punish Danny for the graffiti and his confession that he too wants to “say fuck you to the world” gives Danny permission to see adults as flawed and secret‑bearing. This comfort shapes Danny’s future, and he later credits Mr. Dam with changing his life.

5. Does Artie die by suicide or natural causes?
The text explicitly says Artie dies of a heart attack during a June heat wave. Rob assures Danny it was natural causes. However, Artie’s earlier suicidal ideation and his listlessness in the epilogue leave an ambiguity that Strout does not fully resolve.

For deeper exploration of themes, see our pages on loneliness, secrets and lies, and free will. Also read the ending explained and questions and answers.