Notebooks Symbol Analysis in The Collected Regrets of Clover
The Notebooks as a System of Witness and Self-Discovery
The notebooks in The Collected Regrets of Clover are the novel's central symbol—a physical system Clover builds to capture the final words of dying people. They begin as a professional tool for her death-doula work and gradually transform into something more personal: a mirror, a guidebook, and finally a record of her own life. The arc of the notebooks—from documenting others to documenting herself—tracks Clover's movement from observation to participation, and from emotional suppression toward human connection and vulnerability.
What the Notebooks Literally Are
Clover keeps a series of labeled notebooks—CONFESSIONS, REGRETS, ADVICE, and ADVENTURES—each serving a distinct purpose. The first three document the last words of her dying clients: confessions of guilt, regrets about paths not taken, and advice for living. The fourth, ADVENTURES, is given to her by Hugo at the end of the novel and represents a new chapter in her life.
The notebooks have a clear origin. On her ninth birthday, Grandpa Patrick gifts her a navy-blue leather-bound notebook, a silver fountain pen, and a pair of binoculars. He tells her that infinite curiosity and a keen sense of observation will serve her better than intelligence, wit, or charm. He teaches her to look for patterns in nature and in people, and his own notebook—which he regularly pauses to write in—serves as a model. This gift establishes the notebook as a tool for understanding the world through careful attention, a lesson that shapes Clover's entire approach to life and work.
The Four Notebooks and Their Functions
The CONFESSIONS notebook holds the guilty secrets of the dying. Guillermo's confession—that he accidentally killed his sister's hamster at age eleven—is the first we see recorded. Clover treats these confessions as debts she can help repay: she volunteers at animal shelters in Guillermo's memory, slips money into street musicians' cases for Ronald the accountant, and considers adopting a hamster.
The REGRETS notebook holds the dying's regrets. Abigail's last words—wishing she'd told loved ones how much she loved them—are noted as a recurring theme. Clover honors these regrets by trying to avoid the same mistakes: after reading Camille Salem's regret about not eating mangoes until age fifty, she searches the city for a delicious mango and savors it.
The ADVICE notebook holds guidance for living. Bruce the plumber advises buying fresh flowers; Dorothy the dog groomer advises listening more than speaking. Clover tries to live by one piece of advice each week, treating the notebook as a practical guide for daily life.
The ADVENTURES notebook, given by Hugo at JFK, is different. It's not filled with the words of the dying but with Clover's own experiences as she travels the world. The epilogue confirms she's been recording her adventures in it during her three months of travel, and the inscription Hugo writes—