Characters Imogen, Obviously Becky Albertalli

Lili Cardoso: The Catalyst of Imogen’s Queer Awakening

Overview

Lili Cardoso is Imogen Scott’s best friend since childhood and a first-year student at Blackwell College. She comes out to Imogen as pansexual during a car ride home from a graduation party in June of their junior year, making Imogen the first person she tells — before her own family. Lili’s decision to invent a fake backstory that she and Imogen were ex-girlfriends during orientation week sets the entire plot of Imogen, Obviously in motion. Her role evolves from a secure, out queer friend into a vulnerable young woman navigating her own insecurities about being a “baby queer,” while ultimately becoming Imogen’s most steadfast supporter.

Plot Role

Lili serves as the catalyst for Imogen’s journey of self-discovery. When Imogen visits Blackwell for the first time, Lili confesses that she panicked during orientation week and told her new friend group — Declan, Mika, Kayla, and Tessa — that Imogen was her ex-girlfriend, complete with a fictional timeline (they got together on New Year’s, broke up in July). This lie forces Imogen to adopt a bisexual identity in front of strangers, which triggers her latent questioning. Lili also provides emotional scaffolding: she checks in repeatedly, offers to set the record straight, and eventually becomes the confidante who helps Imogen unpack her feelings for Tessa. In the final chapters, Lili defends Imogen’s queerness against Gretchen’s accusations, drives her home, and affirms that queer identity does not require suffering to be valid.

Motivations and Traits Shown Through Actions

Lili’s primary motivation is her desire to feel “legit” among her queer college friends. She tells Imogen she felt like an imposter during orientation because she had only been out for three months and had never dated anyone. By claiming Imogen as an ex-girlfriend, she attempts to close the gap between her own experience and her friends’ more established queer histories. This reveals her insecurity and people-pleasing tendency — traits she shares with Imogen, though Lili masks them with a sharper exterior. She is also fiercely loyal: she defends Imogen when Gretchen attacks her identity, and she confronts Imogen about months of avoidance not out of anger but out of hurt and love. Her wit and sarcasm (the fake French Twitter persona “Jean-Claude LePoisson,” the “baby queer” self-deprecation) serve as both humor and armor.

Chronological Arc

Lili’s arc spans her evolution from a nervous, self-doubting “baby queer” into a confident advocate for Imogen. The key beats:

  • Before the novel: Lili comes out to Imogen in a car ride home from Brianna Lewis’s graduation party — a moment Imogen recalls as “a photograph pinned to the wall of my brain.” This is Lili’s first disclosure, emphasizing the trust between them.
  • Chapter 3–4: Lili reveals her lie to Imogen, explaining that she wanted to feel “more legit.” She promises not to hate Imogen if Imogen wants to expose the truth, but Imogen agrees to go along with it.
  • Throughout the visit: Lili acts as a bridge between Imogen and her new friends, but also checks in privately, sensing Imogen’s discomfort even when Imogen denies it.
  • Months later (Chapter 41): When Imogen returns for the dark academia party, Lili confronts her about avoiding Blackwell. She reveals that Imogen was the first person she came out to, and her hurt at being avoided is palpable. This confrontation resolves their rift and deepens their intimacy.
  • Diner confrontation (Chapter 51): Lili stays quiet during Gretchen’s biphobic tirade, but afterwards she drives Imogen home and engages in a reflective conversation about queer suffering. She urges Imogen to reply to Gretchen while she’s still angry, showing her support.
  • Final chapter (Chapter 58): Lili drives Imogen away from Gretchen’s apology texts, validating Imogen’s feelings and insisting that queerness does not have to be earned through pain.

Relationships

Imogen: The central relationship. Lili and Imogen share a deep childhood bond — scents, memories, inside jokes. Lili’s lie strains this friendship at first, but ultimately strengthens it as Imogen learns that Lili’s queer identity does not exclude her. Lili’s confrontation in Chapter 41 forces Imogen to admit her intimidation, and Lili’s response — “I cried when you told me you were coming here” — reaffirms their connection.

Tessa: Lili is close friends with Tessa, but she also knows Tessa’s flirtatious nature. When Imogen starts texting Tessa, Lili cautions that Tessa “flirts with everyone,” but she does not block the relationship. She later observes Imogen’s crush and offers subtle encouragement without prying.

Gretchen: Lili and Gretchen have an undercurrent of tension dating back to a Pride Alliance debate about gatekeeping (Chapter 32). Lili believes Gretchen unfairly assumes bad faith about unlabeled queer people, while Gretchen dismisses Lili’s perspective because Lili wasn’t out at the time. This animosity resurfaces at the diner, where Lili witnesses Gretchen’s biphobia but ultimately sides with Imogen.

Declan, Mika, Kayla: Lili’s “pack of queers” accept her warmly. Their dynamics are playful — the sausage game, trivia night, shared stories. Lili uses her friends as a sounding board but also feels inadequate compared to their longer histories.

Key Decisions and Consequences

  1. Inventing the ex-girlfriend story: Lili’s decision to claim Imogen as her ex during orientation week is the inciting incident. It forces Imogen into a false identity, but it also creates the conditions for Imogen to question her sexuality. The consequence is a temporary rift between Lili and Imogen when Imogen avoids visiting, but ultimately the lie leads to Imogen’s authentic self-discovery.

  2. Confronting Imogen about avoidance: In Chapter 41, Lili directly asks why Imogen kept her distance. This brave vulnerability repairs their friendship and reveals that Imogen’s fear of invading queer spaces was mutual. It also prompts Imogen to start talking about her crush without using gendered language, a key step in her coming out.

  3. Defending Imogen at the diner (indirectly): Lili does not verbally defend Imogen during Gretchen’s attack, but she drives Imogen home and initiates the conversation about queerness and suffering. This decision to support Imogen behind the scenes rather than escalate the public fight shows Lili’s emotional intelligence.

  4. Urging Imogen to reply while angry: In the car after the diner, Lili tells Imogen to respond to Gretchen while still in a “fuck that shit” mood. This advice empowers Imogen to set boundaries and claim her identity without apology.

Theme and Symbol Connections

Lili is central to the novel’s exploration of queer community and allyship. Her lie exemplifies the pressure to perform queerness for others — a theme explored in the authenticity vs. performance analysis. She also embodies compulsory heterosexuality by initially hiding her own coming out timeline, only to later reject the idea that pain validates identity (highlighted in the ending explained). Her relationship with Imogen illustrates self-discovery and queer identity: Imogen’s journey begins because Lili trusted her with a secret. The friendship and belonging theme is reflected in Lili’s desire to fit in with her queer pack, and her fear that Imogen might not belong there.

5 Book-Specific Questions and Answers

  1. Why does Lili lie about Imogen being her ex-girlfriend?
    During orientation week, Lili felt like an imposter because she had only been out for three months and had never dated anyone. She panicked and invented the story to seem more “legit” to her new queer friends. She tells Imogen she was being a “dumbass” and regrets it almost immediately.

  2. How does Lili’s coming-out story differ from what she tells her college friends?
    Lili tells her friends that she came out in high school, when in truth she came out just three months before starting college. Imogen was the first person she told — during a car ride home from a graduation party the previous summer.

  3. What causes the temporary rift between Lili and Imogen?
    Imogen avoids visiting Blackwell for months because she feels intimidated by Lili’s queer community and fears she doesn’t belong. Lili interprets the avoidance as a personal rejection and feels hurt, especially since Imogen returns quickly when Tessa invites her. They reconcile in Chapter 41 when Lili confronts Imogen directly.

  4. How does Lili defend Imogen against Gretchen’s accusations in the diner?
    Lili does not engage in a public argument but later, in the car ride home, she validates Imogen’s feelings and explicitly rejects the idea that queer people must suffer to be real. She urges Imogen to reply to Gretchen while still feeling angry, empowering Imogen to own her identity.

  5. What does the “You were the first person I came out to” confession reveal about Lili?
    It reveals that Lili trusted Imogen more than anyone else — before her family, before her college friends. This confession deepens their bond and helps Imogen understand why Lili was so hurt by her avoidance. It also underscores Lili’s own vulnerability beneath her confident exterior.

Further Reading