Chapter 26: The Force Field Falters

⚠️ Spoiler Warning: This guide contains detailed spoilers for the entire novel. Proceed only if you've finished reading or are comfortable knowing the plot.

Summary

Back home after her visit to Blackwell College, Imogen cannot sleep. She scrolls through social media and sees her college friends living it up without her. Tessa texts her a video of Lili singing, and Imogen replies with an old throwback photo of Lili performing for stuffed animals. The back-and-forth is playful, but Imogen feels an unexpected flutter—a “shooting-star feeling.” She begins to wonder if she might have a crush on Tessa. This thought unsettles her because she has always assumed she is straight. She reflects on her sister Edith’s clear queerness and the assumption that one queer kid per family is enough. Imogen also considers how being perceived as straight gave her a “force field” that made interactions with girls safe. Now, with Tessa believing she is bi, that safety is gone. She ends by asking herself whether one girl can truly topple an entire sexuality.

Key Events

Imogen lies awake in her childhood bedroom, feeling “unzipped” and restless.
She scrolls Instagram and TikTok, seeing her Blackwell friends (Declan, Mika, and others) out together without her.
Tessa texts Imogen a video of Lili singing at karaoke, captioned “Our girl can SING!!??”
Imogen sends a throwback photo of Lili performing with stuffed animals.
Tessa recognizes the toy dog “Puppy,” and Imogen confirms he is Lili’s biggest fan.
During the exchange, Imogen feels a sudden, strong emotional reaction that she interprets as a possible crush.
She questions whether the feeling is genuine or a result of pretending to be bi for Lili’s sake.
Imogen recalls her earlier assumption that one queer sibling per family is enough, based on her sister Edith.
She contrasts her own uncertainty with Edith’s lifelong certainty about being queer.
Imogen admits she misses the “force field” of being perceived as straight, which allowed her to interact with girls without romantic implications.
The chapter ends with her internal challenge: “One girl can’t topple your entire sexuality, right?”

Character Development

Imogen: This chapter marks the first moment she explicitly considers she might not be straight. Her earlier “bi now, ask later” performance for Lili now feels potentially real. She is vulnerable, confused, and forced to confront assumptions she built about her own identity.
Tessa (off-screen): Though not present, Tessa’s text and the emotional reaction it provokes are the catalyst for Imogen’s questioning. Tessa is now a romantic possibility in Imogen’s mind, not just a friend.
Lili (referenced): Lili’s singing video and the shared memory of “Puppy” reinforce the deep friendship between Imogen and Lili, which complicates the possibility that Imogen was merely performing bisexuality.

Themes, Symbols, or Motifs Evidenced

Identity and Compulsory Heterosexuality: Imogen’s belief that “one queer kid per family is overkill” reflects a subtle form of compulsive heterosexuality—the assumption that straightness is the default unless proven otherwise.
The “Force Field” of Straightness: Imogen describes being seen as straight as a protective barrier that made interactions with girls safe from romantic tension. Losing that force field is both frightening and freeing.
FOMO versus Ache: She distinguishes fear of missing out (FOMO) from a deeper ache of watching others live a life she is not yet part of. This ache is tied to her possible queer identity.
The Phone as a Window: The smartphone screen becomes a portal to another world—Blackwell’s queer community—and a trigger for self-reflection.
Denial as a Curtain: Imogen dismisses denial as a possibility, insisting she has “open access” to her own brain, yet the curtain she describes may itself be a form of denial.

Why This Chapter Matters

Chapter 26 is the emotional turning point where Imogen’s carefully managed performance of bisexuality collides with genuine feeling. Until now, she has treated her “bi identity” as a role she played to help Lili. Here, for the first time, she asks herself if it might actually be true. The chapter lays the groundwork for the coming identity crisis and deepens the novel’s exploration of how we know what we want and who we are.

Study Questions and Answers

1. What triggers Imogen’s questioning of her sexuality in this chapter?
The trigger is a text from Tessa containing a video of Lili singing. The playful exchange and Imogen’s strong emotional reaction—the “shooting-star feeling”—make her wonder if she has a crush on Tessa, which forces her to reconsider the assumption that she is straight.

2. How does Imogen’s perception of her sister Edith shape her own sense of identity?
Imogen has always used Edith as a benchmark for queerness. Because Edith was certain of her identity from preschool, Imogen assumed that if she were queer, she would “at least sort of know.” She also internalized the idea that one queer sibling is the norm, making her own queerness seem unnecessary or impossible.

3. What does Imogen mean by the “force field” of being straight, and why does she miss it?
She describes straightness as a built-in force field that prevents romantic tension when interacting with other girls. When people believe she is straight, she can laugh, text, and act freely without worrying about being perceived as “too much” or having a hidden crush. Now that Tessa thinks she is bi, that safety is gone, and Imogen feels vulnerable to her own emerging feelings.