Chapter 189 Summary & Analysis – Maybe We Can Be Friends?: Hugh
⚠️ Spoiler Notice
This page contains detailed plot points and character developments from Chapter 189 of Releasing 10 (The Boys of Tommen) by Chloe Walsh. If you have not yet read up to this point, proceed with caution.
Summary
At two in the morning on December 30, 2003, Hugh is showering when his ex-girlfriend Lizzie locks herself in the bathroom with him. She apologizes for an earlier outburst at her house and begs for reconciliation. Hugh lies and says he plans to score with someone else to push her away, but Lizzie steps naked into the shower and embraces him. As she cries and promises to take her medication and do anything to keep him, Hugh explains that he cannot trust her not to repeat the destructive pattern: mania, medication abandonment, cheating, and suicidal depression. He tells her he loves her but refuses to get back together, offering only a distant possibility of friendship. The chapter ends with them holding each other while Hugh insists he will always love her.
Key Events
- Hugh discovers Lizzie waiting in his bathroom while he showers and orders her out.
- Lizzie locks the door, apologizes for a previous meltdown at her house, and says she needs to see him.
- Hugh threatens that he plans to “score” with someone else the next night—a lie meant to hurt her and end the conversation.
- Lizzie removes her clothes and steps into the shower, wrapping her arms around Hugh’s waist.
- She begs for another chance, promising to take medication, attend counseling, quit drinking, and stop seeing other boys.
- Hugh refuses, explaining that her cycles of mania and depression have repeatedly led to cheating, self-harm, and his own sleepless vigilance.
- Despite his love for her, Hugh says he cannot plan a future with someone who may “switch up” at any moment.
- He offers only the possibility of friendship after time has passed, knowing he can never truly be “just a friend.”
Character Development
- Hugh reveals the depth of his love and pain. He is no longer the boy who caves to every plea; he now verbalizes the unsustainable pattern—the loss of sleep, the constant fear, the razors he has wrestled away. His refusal, though heartbreaking, marks a step toward self-preservation and respect.
- Lizzie is shown at her most vulnerable: crying, naked, clinging, and willing to promise anything. Yet her desperation also underscores the very instability Hugh fears—she is manic-adjacent in her pleading, which validates his caution. Her inability to see beyond the immediate moment confirms why trust has eroded.
Themes, Symbols, or Motifs
- Toxic Codependency: The shower embrace symbolises how their love both comforts and drowns them. Hugh cannot let go physically even as he tries to set a boundary.
- Mental Illness and Trust: Lizzie’s unmedicated bipolar cycles are the unspoken antagonist. Hugh’s refusal is not a rejection of her, but of the chaos her illness creates when she stops treatment.
- The “Good Girl” Promise: Lizzie’s repeated vow to “be good” reflects her internalised shame and Hugh’s role as caretaker, a dynamic that is neither healthy nor sustainable.
- Water as Catharsis: The shower provides a private space for raw emotion, washing away pretences but also blurring the line between comfort and surrender.
Why This Chapter Matters
Chapter 189 crystallises the central conflict of Hugh and Lizzie’s relationship. After many breakups and makeups, Hugh finally articulates exactly why he cannot stay—even though he loves her. The chapter moves the story past the “will they/won’t they” tension into a clearer, more painful understanding: love alone cannot overcome the damage caused by untreated mental illness and broken trust. It sets up Hugh’s emotional arc toward healing (or further heartbreak) and Lizzie’s potential rock bottom or turning point.
Study Questions & Answers
1. Why does Hugh lie about planning to score with someone else?
Hugh admits the lie to Lizzie after she enters the shower. He says it was “complete bullshit” but he needed to arm himself, to make himself believe he could move on and to hurt her as she has hurt him. It is a desperate act of self-protection born from exhaustion.
2. What specific pattern of behaviour does Hugh describe that makes him unable to trust Lizzie?
Hugh lists a cycle: Lizzie feels better, stops taking her medication, becomes manic, engages in hypersexual behaviour (cheating), then crashes into severe depression where she attempts suicide, leaving Hugh to constantly watch her. He cannot endure another decade of sleepless fear.
3. Why does Hugh offer only “maybe friends” instead of a full reconciliation?
Hugh knows he will always love Lizzie, but he also knows that taking her back would repeat the same painful loop. Saying “maybe we can be friends” is both a gentle lie to soften the blow and a sign of his own weakness—he cannot sever ties completely, even as he tries to enforce a boundary.