Themes The Surrogate Mother Freida McFadden

The Torment of Infertility and the Price of Motherhood in The Surrogate Mother

The Thematic Claim

In The Surrogate Mother, Freida McFadden weaves a psychological thriller around a single, devastating desire: Abby Adler’s longing to become a mother. The novel argues that infertility is not merely a medical condition but an emotional and identity-shattering experience that can distort judgment, push boundaries, and lead individuals into dangerous compromises. At the same time, it questions what it means to be a mother—whether biology, legal contracts, or love alone can define that bond. Abby’s journey through failed IVF, a collapsed adoption, and a risky surrogate arrangement exposes the raw nerve of infertility while also exploring the moral ambiguities that arise when a woman will do almost anything to hold a child in her arms.

The Wound of Infertility

Abby’s infertility is established early as a deep personal failure. After years of trying, she learns that her fallopian tubes are scarred and her eggs are “poor quality”—a diagnosis that makes her feel like an absolute failure as a woman. The evidence from Chapter 3 details her obsessive quest: fertility tea, vegan diets, constant monitoring of online forums with acronyms like TTC, AF, and DPT. Each negative pregnancy test is a fresh wound. Sam’s sperm is normal, which only intensifies Abby’s guilt. She is the “defective” one, a belief reinforced by her boss Denise’s unsympathetic attitude toward medical appointments. This emotional toll primes Abby to grasp at any option that promises motherhood, even when those options prove reckless.

The Crushed Hope of Adoption

After IVF fails, Sam persuades Abby to pursue adoption. She resists at first but eventually commits, and the couple is matched with a birth mother named Janelle. They prepare a nursery, buy a car seat, and even hold a baby shower. Then, in Chapter 3, Sam delivers the news: Janelle has changed her mind. The foundation of Abby’s hope collapses. The evidence shows Abby tripping over the bassinet, crying in Sam’s arms, and receiving a cold text from Denise asking about canceling maternity leave. This second failure—not biological, but legal and emotional—deepens her desperation. Abby’s insistence on a newborn (over an older child) reveals her attachment to a fantasy of infancy, a dream she refuses to surrender even after repeated disappointments.

The Surrogate Gamble

When her assistant Monica offers to be a surrogate, Abby initially resists, calling the idea “insane.” Yet the proposal—a baby in exchange for tuition—seems to solve everything. Abby’s desire blunts her caution. She ignores the obvious red flags: Monica’s obsession, the unequal power dynamic, and Sam’s reluctance. In Chapter 10, Monica announces her pregnancy on the first try. The pregnancy test with two blue lines becomes a symbol of hope but also of Abby’s willingness to outsource motherhood. By Chapter 13, Abby’s mother warns her not to trust Sam alone with “that woman,” but Abby dismisses it. The surrogate arrangement is the logical extreme of infertility’s psychological cost: Abby commodifies reproduction, trading financial security for a child. The story later reveals the hidden cost—Monica’s obsession with Sam, the violence, and the near-death confrontation in Chapter 40.

Symbols of Longing and Loss

McFadden uses everyday objects to crystallize the theme. The pregnancy test with its two blue lines represents both Abby’s triumph and her blindness. The childhood blanket in the Epilogue becomes a haunting symbol of Monica’s indelible presence: Abby plans to discard it, but her son David clings to the scent of Monica’s perfume. The baby’s heartbeat recording (implied in the story) and the letter opener (used as a threat) further tie motherhood to danger. Abby’s infertility is not cured by the baby’s birth; it is merely transferred into a new anxiety—that Monica’s legacy will never be erased.

Complexity and Contradiction

The novel refuses a simple resolution. Abby becomes a mother, but at what cost? She nearly dies, her husband is shot, and the surrogate is now in a vegetative state. The final image—David burying his face in Monica’s blanket—suggests that the biological link (even via surrogacy) cannot be severed. Abby’s infertility drove her to a decision that placed her family in mortal peril, yet she still loves the child. The theme thus contains a contradiction: motherhood is achieved, but it is haunted by the very desperation that made it possible. The story does not condemn Abby’s choices; instead, it illustrates the powerful, sometimes dangerous, pull of the maternal instinct.

Study Questions and Answers

  1. How does Abby’s infertility shape her relationship with Sam?
    Abby feels guilty that her “defective” body prevents Sam from having a child. This guilt makes her vulnerable to risky decisions, and it also strains their communication—Sam’s initial reluctance about surrogacy is met with Abby’s insistence. Their love remains strong, but the infertility creates an undercurrent of blame and desperation.

  2. What role does Denise Holt play in Abby’s journey?
    Denise represents the workplace’s lack of empathy for infertility. She pressures Abby to shorten maternity leave and cancels family leave without compassion. Abby’s hatred for Denise (who later becomes a murder victim) reflects her internalized frustration at a world that treats infertility as an inconvenience.

  3. Why does Abby agree to Monica’s surrogacy offer even though she knows it is inappropriate?
    Abby is emotionally exhausted after years of failure. Monica’s proposal—a baby in exchange for tuition—appears as a win-win. Abby overlooks the power dynamic because she is desperate for a newborn, the dream she refused to abandon after the adoption collapse.

  4. How does the childhood blanket symbolize the unresolved presence of Monica?
    The blanket carries Monica’s scent, and David’s emotional reaction to it shows that he is connected to his biological mother in ways Abby cannot control. It represents the truth that surrogacy leaves a trace, and that Abby will always share motherhood with Monica, even if Monica is unconscious.

  5. What is the novel’s final message about the relationship between infertility and motherhood?
    The novel suggests that infertility does not end with the arrival of a child; the trauma of the struggle lingers. Motherhood is achieved through risk and moral compromise, and the bond between mother and child is real, but it is shadowed by the lengths one went to obtain it. The theme is not a condemnation but a cautionary examination of the power of longing.

For further exploration, see the book overview, character analyses of Abby, Sam, Monica, Gertie, and Shelley, as well as symbol pages for the pregnancy test, letter opener, baby’s heartbeat recording, and childhood blanket.