Chapter 43 (Kapitel 42) Summary & Characters: The Cost of Survival

Spoiler Notice

This page contains major spoilers for Chapter 43 of Leave Me Behind. If you have not yet read up to this point, please proceed with caution.

Summary

Nell stays with the mortally wounded Jenkins, whose throat is twisted and face slashed. She gently strokes his cheek and tells him to look at the mess he caused. Jenkins asks her to hum his favorite song, “Davy Jones,” and she complies as they bleed together. When Bradshaw hands her a pistol, Nell presses it to Jenkins’s temple. He whispers that he was made of darkness and thanks her for showing him light. Nell says she loves him, then fires. She collapses onto his chest, sobbing, and discovers a silver music box engraved with bunnies in his pocket. Inside is the engraving: “Damit du an mich denkst, wenn ich fort bin. Gallows & Jenkins” (So you’ll think of me when I’m gone). Bradshaw helps her up, and they decide to head to the extraction point so the deaths won’t be wasted. They hear a helicopter and then someone calling—Eren, carried by Paul. Eren’s legs are mangled; one is barely attached, the other missing below the knee. Bradshaw embraces his brother. Paul has improvised a tourniquet. They reach the helicopter, which belongs to Canadian allies Eren contacted. In the hospital weeks later, Nell visits Bradshaw and Eren, bringing lattes. The three tease each other, and Bradshaw whispers to Nell, asking her to promise him eternity. She replies that he is where her sanity ends.

Key Events

Nell hums “Davy Jones” as Jenkins dies in her arms.
Nell shoots Jenkins in a mercy killing, then screams in grief.
Nell discovers a silver music box in Jenkins’s pocket with a personal engraving.
Bradshaw supports Nell, and they decide to proceed to extraction.
Eren and Paul appear; Eren has severe leg injuries.
The group is rescued by a Canadian helicopter.
Weeks later, the survivors recover in a hospital where Nell brings coffee.
Bradshaw asks Nell to “promise me eternity”; she responds with a playful twist on his words.

Character Development

Nell – This chapter marks a turning point for Nell. She must kill her lover Jenkins to end his suffering, a brutal act that she undertakes with love. Her grief is raw and vocal. Afterward, she shows resilience by choosing to return to civilization rather than die with the dead. In the hospital, her playful personality resurfaces, but the memory of Jenkins’s smile and the music box stays with her.

Jenkins – Even in death, Jenkins displays his signature blend of darkness and tenderness. He asks for “Davy Jones,” a lament he loved. His final words acknowledge his own nature as “Finsternis” (darkness) and express gratitude for Nell. The music box he prepared beforehand reveals that he anticipated his death and wanted Nell to have a keepsake.

Bradshaw – Throughout the chapter, Bradshaw is Nell’s anchor. He offers her the pistol, helps her stand, and says he would die with her if she wished. When they find Eren, he drops to his knees and embraces his brother, showing deep familial love. In the hospital, his humor returns, and he openly asks Nell for a lifelong commitment.

Eren – Severely wounded, Eren survives thanks to Paul’s aid. His spirit remains intact; in the hospital he jokes, calls Nell “Bunny,” and feigns horror when Bradshaw and Nell kiss. His survival hints at the possibility of a normal future, even with disability.

Paul – The ex-enemy soldier now acts as a savior. He carries Eren, applies a tourniquet, and drives the exhausted group to extraction. After Calgary, he goes his own way, content with freedom.

Themes, Symbols, or Motifs

Mercy and Love – Nell’s killing of Jenkins is an act of love, not vengeance. The scene blends tenderness (stroking his hair, humming) with violence (the gunshot). It asks whether death can be a gift.

Memory and Keepsakes – The music box serves as a tangible symbol of Jenkins’s love and his wish to be remembered. The engraving “Damit du an mich denkst, wenn ich fort bin” directly addresses the theme of memory surviving death.

Rescue vs. Abandonment – The chapter contrasts the fate of the dead (left in Labrador) with the hope of the living. Nell and Bradshaw almost give up, but the arrival of Eren and Paul reignites their will to survive.

Found Family – The bond among Nell, Bradshaw, Eren, and even Paul demonstrates that family is created through shared trauma and loyalty. Bradshaw’s calling Nell “Bun” and “Bunny” underscores intimacy.

Dual Sanity/Insanity – Nell’s final line (“Du bist da, wo die meine endet”) flips Bradshaw’s romantic sentiment, suggesting their relationship is both grounding and unhinging. This motif of sanity and chaos runs throughout the book.

Why This Chapter Matters

Chapter 43 delivers the emotional climax of Jenkins’s arc and the physical climax of the escape from Labrador. Nell’s mercy killing is one of the most harrowing moments in the story, solidifying her capacity for both love and violence. The chapter also reunites the core survivors—Nell, Bradshaw, Eren—ensuring that the trio’s dynamic will drive the conclusion. The music box is a poignant symbol that keeps Jenkins’s presence alive. Finally, the hospital scene provides a necessary respite and a glimpse of a future beyond war, giving readers hope while still tinged with grief.

Study Questions and Answers

Why does Nell kill Jenkins instead of leaving him to die naturally?
Nell ends Jenkins’s life to spare him further agony. His injuries are clearly fatal, and he asks her to hum for him before she pulls the trigger. By killing him herself, she gives him a death accompanied by love and acknowledgment of his darkness, rather than a lonely, lingering end.
What does the music box represent for Nell and for the story?
The music box is a physical object that preserves Jenkins’s memory. For Nell, it becomes a talisman she holds against her heart. For the narrative, it symbolizes that even in a brutal world, characters prepare for loss and leave behind tokens of affection. The engraving “Gallows & Jenkins” ties their nicknames together, immortalizing their bond.
How does the mood shift from the extraction scene to the hospital scene?
The extraction scene is filled with exhaustion, grief, and urgency—Nell and Bradshaw are bleeding and broken. The hospital scene is light and humorous, with teasing and coffee. This shift underscores the characters’ resilience; they can joke again because they survived. It also shows that recovery is possible, though scars remain.