Sam Character Analysis: The Soul of Hope in I Fell in Love With Hope

Overview

Sam is the unnamed narrator of Lancali’s I Fell in Love With Hope. They are not a human patient but the living soul of hope itself, born from the dreams of the hospital’s builders. Sam exists to keep suffering company, yet they are shaped by the humans they love. Over two centuries, Sam falls in love with a series of people who represent different facets of humanity: the first Sam (a lonely boy), Resilience (Erik), Kindness (Coley), Passion (Ryu), and finally Hikari, the girl with yellow-flared eyes. This analysis focuses on the narrator Sam—the soul who gives the story its voice.

Plot Role and Identity

Sam serves as both protagonist and observer. They are the “hope” the title names, yet they are not all-powerful. The evidence shows that hope cannot save everyone; sometimes it can only hold a hand until the end. Sam’s narrative frame bookends the novel: from their origin in Chapter 12 (named by the first Sam) to their final goodbye to Hikari in Chapter 32. Throughout the main story, Sam is the one who ties the group of terminally ill teens together, helping them steal back moments from Time, Disease, and Death—a “Hit List” they all share. But Sam is also a victim of loss, haunted by the boy who gave them their name.

Motivations, Traits, and Actions

Sam’s primary motivation is to alleviate loneliness—both their own and others’. They are deeply curious, compassionate, and self-sacrificing. As the soul of hope, they “lost” the ability to feel for over a century, but meeting the first Sam reawakened warmth. Sam’s actions include:

• Giving comfort: holding Neo after relapses, bandaging Hikari’s wrists, sitting with Sony in her final hours.
• Rebelling against fate: orchestrating hospital escapes, stealing a watch, planting a succulent for Hikari.
• Choosing love despite fear: after losing the first Sam to suicide, Sam (the narrator) closes off, yet they choose to love Hikari and the others anyway.

A key trait is their honesty about their own emptiness. In Chapter 8, Sam confesses to feeling like a skull, and Hikari later calls them “despair in love with hope.” This dual nature makes Sam a complex protagonist: they are hope, yet they carry the weight of every patient who died.

Chronological Arc

The arc of Sam’s story spans centuries, but the novel focuses on two timelines:

1. Before the novel (Chapters labeled “Before”): Sam is born as a nameless soul, meets the boy Sam, falls in love, and watches him die on a bridge. After a century of numbness, Sam creates a body and begins walking among patients.
2. The main timeline: Sam meets Hikari, Neo, Sony, and Coeur. They form a found family, rebel against their diagnoses, and face Sony’s death, Coeur’s transplant, and Neo’s suicide. Sam repeatedly saves Hikari from despair and finally reveals their true nature to her before she is discharged.

Sam’s personal arc is about learning to hope even when hope is not enough. In Chapter 31, they cross a bridge they could not cross before to save Hikari, symbolically facing their trauma. By the end, Sam accepts that love persists beyond loss.

Relationships

Sam’s relationships define the novel. The first Sam, a “knight” who gave the narrator his name, remains the soul’s eternal benchmark for love. With the friend group, Sam is the anchor: they bring Neo a notebook, comfort Sony after her mother’s death, and persuade Coeur to rekindle with Neo. But the deepest bond is with Hikari.

• Hikari: She sees Sam as a “familiar stranger.” Their relationship mirrors the narrator’s earlier love—two broken souls finding solace. Sam’s role is to mirror her despair and model survival. When Hikari asks if Sam loves her or just cares out of pity, Sam proves his love by staying through her worst relapses.
• The first Sam: The boy who died in the snow taught Sam what joy and warmth feel like. His death taught Sam that hope is fragile. That loss shadows everything Sam does, making them hesitant to fully love again.
• Neo, Sony, Coeur: Each taught Sam a different form of resilience, passion, and kindness. In the end, Sam carries their memories, promising to fall in love with them in every life.

Key Decisions and Consequences

Each choice reinforces the theme that love requires vulnerability. Sam’s greatest consequence is living on after those they love die, yet they continue to choose hope.

Themes and Symbolism

Sam embodies the novel’s central theme of hope and despair. They are the “soul of an unfulfilled wish,” and their existence proves that hope is not a cure but a companion. The recurring motif of stars—the first Sam’s “stars” that the narrator later shares with Hikari—represents moments of beauty in darkness. Sam also symbolizes grief and memory: they remember every patient, carrying their stories forward. The idea of love and chosen family is central: Sam’s family is made of the sick children and teens they protect. Finally, the rebellion against fate plays out in Sam’s Hit List—stealing back childhoods and endings. But Sam also represents identity and brokenness, as they have no original body or name, only the one given by love.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. Is Sam the same person as the boy who died on the bridge?
No. The first Sam was a human boy born without an immune system. The narrator Sam is the soul of hope who fell in love with that boy. After the boy’s death, the narrator kept his name. They are two distinct beings.

2. Why does Sam refer to themselves as both male and female?
In Chapter 32, Sam explains they are not a man or woman, child or adult; they are whatever the person in need perceives. The narrator uses he/him pronouns mainly because the first Sam was a boy, but the soul has no fixed gender.

3. What is Sam’s “Hit List”?
The notebook lists three targets: Time, Disease, and Death. Sam and their friends steal back moments like childhood experiences, dreams, and dignity. It is a literal and symbolic rebellion against terminal illness.

4. Does Sam die at the end of the novel?
Sam does not die because they are an immortal soul bound to the hospital. They fade from Hikari’s sight after her discharge but continue to exist. Hikari promises to return at the end of her life, suggesting Sam will be waiting.

5. What does Sam learn by the end of the story?
Sam learns that hope is not about preventing loss but about loving fully despite it. They learn that grief is proof of love, and that falling in love again—even after heartbreak—is the bravest act.

For a deeper explanation of the novel’s ambiguous ending, see our ending explained. For more on the story’s key questions, visit our questions and answers.