The Pilón and Puerto Rican Flag in This Could Be Us
What Is a Pilón? The Mortar as a Cultural Artifact
A pilón is a traditional wooden or stone mortar used in Puerto Rican kitchens to grind spices, herbs, and aromatics—especially the sofrito base that anchors many island dishes. In Kennedy Ryan’s This Could Be Us, the pilón appears as one of the treasured items Soledad Barnes discovers in her late mother’s chest. Alongside the Puerto Rican flag, the pilón embodies practical, everyday love passed down through generations. It is not merely a cooking tool; it is a vessel of memory, a witness to countless family meals, and a quiet emblem of the hands that shaped Soledad’s childhood.
The chest also contains a machete with a mother-of-pearl handle, used by three generations of women to split coconuts and cut brush. Together with the flag and the pilón, these objects form a tactile archive of maternal wisdom and resistance. The pilón, specifically, represents the labor of care: the grinding, the stirring, the patience that transforms raw ingredients into nourishment. For Soledad, handling the pilón is a way to physically connect with her mother’s spirit and reclaim a part of her identity that was nearly erased by her marriage to Edward.
The Puerto Rican Flag: A Symbol of Rebellion and Identity
The flag Soledad unfolds from the chest is not the modern flag, but the first flag of Puerto Rico—the Grito de Lares flag—a banner of rebellion against Spanish colonization. In the novel, Soledad’s heart “sings with pride” when she sees it. This flag, more than a decorative cloth, is a battle cry. It signals that her mother, Catelaya, was not merely a gentle homemaker but a woman of fierce pride and independence. The flag reminds Soledad that her heritage is woven from struggle and resilience, not passivity.
The flag’s appearance is brief but potent. Soledad touches it in a moment of vulnerability, right before a text from her daughter pulls her back into the relentless demands of single motherhood. The flag becomes a touchstone—a reminder that she comes from people who fought for freedom, and that she too can fight for her own liberation from betrayal and self-doubt.
Where These Symbols Recur in the Story
The pilón and flag do not appear repeatedly on the page, but their presence ripples through the narrative in significant ways:
- The chest scene (Chapter 9): Soledad pulls out the flag and the machete (alongside the pilón) while searching for grounding in her mother’s belongings. She does not open the journal yet, but the objects begin to stitch her back together.
- Nochebuena cooking (Chapter 29): Soledad and her sisters make pasteles and coquito—dishes that rely on sofrito, the very mixture a pilón helps create. The ritual of making pasteles is a family affair that honors Mami’s memory and reinforces Boricua traditions.
- Gifting pasteles to Judah (Chapter 33): Soledad brings Judah pasteles and coquito, sharing her culture with him. The food, born from the same traditions the pilón represents, becomes a bridge between their growing intimacy.
- The recipe chapter (Chapter 51): The novel closes with a recipe for picadillo, which includes sofrito. The cookbook reference (Diasporican by Illyanna Maisonet) extends the pilón’s legacy beyond the story, inviting readers to participate in Puerto Rican cooking.
The flag itself recurs only in the chest scene, but its symbolism echoes whenever Soledad asserts her strength—for example, when she tells her sisters about her “self-partnering” journey or when she resists the urge to rush back into a relationship.
How Their Meaning Evolves Throughout Soledad’s Journey
At the start of the novel, these objects are simply remnants of a lost mother. Soledad touches them with a mixture of grief and anxiety. She is still recovering from Edward’s betrayal and the dissolution of her old life. The pilón and flag feel distant, almost abstract—belonging to a woman she is not yet ready to fully become.
As Soledad develops her “Me List” and begins practicing self-partnering and self-love, the objects shift from relics to guides. The flag’s rebellious spirit aligns with her own defiance against the shame Edward left her with. The pilón’s practical, grounded energy mirrors her new focus on building a sustainable career as an influencer and raising her daughters with integrity.
By the epilogue, Soledad has internalized the lesson her mother left behind: that she was a hornet, not a butterfly, and that she loved fully because she first loved herself. The pilón and flag are no longer just heirlooms; they are extensions of her own soul. She has become the woman who grinds her own spices and waves her own flag.
Connections to Characters and Themes
- Soledad: The primary connection is through her mother’s legacy. The pilón and flag help Soledad answer the epigraph’s question—who am I without the roles of wife and mother? They ground her in a lineage of strong Puerto Rican women.
- Judah: Though not Puerto Rican, Judah respects and admires Soledad’s culture. When she brings him pasteles, he embraces the food as a gift of trust. His willingness to learn about her world strengthens their bond and supports the theme of healing and second chances.
- Lupe and Lottie: Soledad’s daughters are raised with Nochebuena traditions—dominoes, pasteles, coquito. The pilón and flag are part of the cultural inheritance they will one day receive, continuing the matriarchal line. This connects to the theme of motherhood and family.
- Edward: Soledad’s ex-husband represents the opposite of these symbols—disregard for heritage, financial dishonesty, and emotional theft. The pilón and flag stand for the authenticity he tried to erase.
- Inez: Soledad’s mother-in-law blames Judah for Edward’s imprisonment. The flag’s rebellion contrasts with Inez’s rigid loyalty to her son, highlighting betrayal and trust as a central tension.
The symbols also touch on neurodiversity and parenting indirectly: Soledad’s patience in the kitchen mirrors the patience Judah shows his autistic sons. Both parents learn that love takes many forms—some as humble as grinding spices, others as bold as raising a flag.
Study Questions and Answers
1. How does the pilón function as a metaphor for Soledad’s emotional labor in the novel?
The pilón requires repeated, rhythmic pounding to transform raw ingredients into sofrito—much like Soledad must grind through her grief, anger, and insecurity to create a new self. The physical effort of using a pilón mirrors the invisible work of healing from betrayal. When Soledad eventually finds peace, she has internalized that same steady, patient strength.
2. Why does the Grito de Lares flag appear in a scene where Soledad is feeling anxious?
Soledad begins opening the chest to escape a moment of panic. The flag—a symbol of rebellion against colonization—immediately anchors her to a legacy of resistance. It reminds her that her ancestors faced far greater oppressions and survived. This context helps her reframe her current struggles as surmountable, even as a text from Lottie pulls her back into routine.
3. In what way do the pilón and flag together represent Soledad’s journey from dependence to independence?
At the chest scene, Soledad regards the items as parts of her mother’s identity, not her own. By the end of the novel, she has adopted the flag’s defiant spirit and the pilón’s craftsmanship into her daily life. She no longer needs Edward’s approval or a man to complete her. The symbols evolve from relics of the past into tools for her present self-authorship.
4. How does the recipe for picadillo in Chapter 51 connect back to the pilón and flag?
The recipe calls for sofrito, the very mixture a pilón is used to prepare. By including a practical recipe, the novel invites readers to taste a piece of Soledad’s culture. The recipe becomes an extension of the flag’s cultural pride—it is a way for readers to participate in the same traditions that ground Soledad. The cookbook reference (Diasporican) also bridges the fictional world to real Puerto Rican culinary heritage, reinforcing the flag’s call to remember and honor one’s roots.
For further exploration of these themes, visit the main book page or dive into the character pages for Soledad Barnes, Judah Cross, and the Barnes family matriarchs.