Chapter 168 (Chapter 24): Zenia’s Wartime Past and Tony’s Awakening
⚠️ Spoiler Warning: This guide contains detailed spoilers for the entire novel. Proceed only if you've finished reading or are comfortable knowing the plot.
Summary
As December deepens, most students leave McClung Hall for the holidays, but Tony stays behind. Zenia keeps her company, mocking Christmas as bourgeois. Tony contentedly watches Zenia cook. Tony has quietly relinquished West to Zenia, believing she could never compete and that Zenia is her only friend. The three sometimes spend time together in Zenia and West’s shabby apartment, where West plays the lute and sings for Zenia. Tony feels like an outsider pressing her nose to a window. One night Tony stays over, sleeping on the floor, and finds it humiliating and painful. During a conversation, Zenia casually mentions that Tony’s mother was a romantic and suggests she may have attempted an abortion. Zenia then discloses her own traumatic childhood: her White Russian mother rented her out to older men from age five, and Zenia later ran away. Tony is horrified yet admiring, realizing Zenia’s life makes her own suburban story seem minor. Zenia asserts that being an orphan frees one from others’ opinions. Tony sees her reflection in Zenia’s eyes: herself turned inside out.
Key Events
- Tony spends the Christmas break at McClung Hall while other students go home; Zenia stays with her and dismisses the holiday.
- Tony acknowledges that she has stepped back from her friendship with West; the trio now consists of Zenia and West as a couple, with Tony as a satellite.
- West plays the lute and sings an old ballad in the couple’s rundown apartment; Tony feels excluded.
- Tony accidentally misses curfew and spends the night on Zenia’s floor, an experience she finds humiliating and emotionally painful.
- During a kitchen conversation, Zenia speculates that Tony’s mother may have attempted an abortion.
- Zenia reveals her own mother forced her into sexual abuse from age five, renting her to older men in postwar Paris; she eventually ran away.
- Tony listens, electrified, and re-evaluates her own history as minor compared to Zenia’s.
- Zenia concludes that being an orphan allows one to become whoever they like; Tony sees her own inverted reflection in Zenia’s eyes.
Character Development
- Tony: Grows as she recognizes her own naïveté and limited view of suffering. Her admiration for Zenia deepens, and she begins to reimagine her own mother’s abandonment. The metaphor of herself “turned inside out” (Tnomerf Ynot) signals an emerging desire to remake her identity.
- Zenia: Reveals a backstory of profound abuse and survival, framed with detached, almost mocking bravado. This disclosure complicates her character: she is both a victim and a manipulator, using her past to create a persona of invincibility.
- West: Remains largely in the background, a gentle figure absorbed in his love for Zenia. His presence serves as a reminder of Tony’s loss and the triangulation of the relationship.
Themes, Symbols, or Motifs
- Orphanhood and Reinvention: Both Tony and Zenia are effectively orphans. Zenia’s claim that orphans can “be whoever you like” resonates with Tony, suggesting that freedom from family expectations enables self-creation.
- The Gaze and Reflection: Tony sees her own reflection in Zenia’s eyes, described as “herself turned inside out” (a palindrome-like inversion). This symbolizes Tony’s desire to transform into a bolder, more self-sufficient version of herself.
- War’s Long Shadow: World War II permeates both women’s lives—Tony’s father damaged by combat, Zenia’s mother a refugee in Paris, the chaos of postwar Europe shaping their fates.
- Cooking and Domesticity as Bonding: Zenia’s kitchen becomes a space of intimacy and storytelling. The act of measuring, blending, and stirring parallels the blending of memories and identities.
- The Ballad: West’s song “The Water Is Wide” echoes the emotional distance between Tony and the couple. It reinforces themes of unattainable love and isolation.
Why This Chapter Matters
This chapter is pivotal for understanding Zenia’s mystique and the source of her power over Tony. By revealing her traumatic past, Zenia gains Tony’s sympathy and admiration, cementing her influence. It also marks a turning point for Tony: she consciously sets aside her own romantic feelings for West and begins to see her mother—and herself—through Zenia’s darker, more worldly lens. The chapter lays the foundation for Tony’s later transformations and for the novel’s central question: who is the real Zenia?
Study Questions and Answers
1. Why does Tony choose to stay at McClung Hall rather than go home for Christmas? Tony stays because she has nowhere else to go and no family to return to; she also prefers Zenia’s company over being alone. Zenia’s sneers at Christmas help Tony feel better about her own isolation.
2. What effect does Zenia’s story about her childhood have on Tony? Tony is horrified but also admiring. She feels her own history shrink in comparison and begins to see Zenia as a survivor who has overcome terrible odds. The story deepens Tony’s loyalty and reshapes her self-image, as she wants to emulate Zenia’s fearless reinvention.
3. How does the chapter use the motif of reflection or mirroring? Tony sees her own reflection in Zenia’s eyes, described as “herself turned inside out.” This suggests that Zenia represents a reversed image of Tony—bolder, more ruthless, and free from the constraints of conventional morality. It hints at Tony’s unconscious desire to adopt aspects of Zenia’s persona.