The Son in Kate Baer's And Yet: Innocence, Misunderstanding, and Maternal Love

Overview

In Kate Baer’s poetry collection And Yet, the speaker’s son is not a named, continuously developed character but a recurring presence whose actions and words illuminate the collection’s central themes. He appears in several poems as a source of innocent misinterpretations, viral questions, and the object of the speaker’s protective, often worried, maternal attention. The son’s role is less about individual agency and more about serving as a mirror for the speaker’s own anxieties, hopes, and the evolving nature of motherhood. He embodies the tension between a mother’s desire to shield her child and the child’s inevitable exposure to a flawed world.

Plot Role and Appearances

The son surfaces in key poems that span different stages of his childhood. In “Late Summer in a Global Pandemic”, he asks for a new skateboard and, more painfully, for a different mother—a raw moment that captures pandemic-era family stress. In “On a Thursday Afternoon”, he reports a friend’s hateful comment about homosexuality, mishearing “abomination” as “a bomb in nation,” a misstep that disarms prejudice and prompts the speaker to turn to prayer. In “The Worst Part”, the speaker takes her sons to a river where they undergo a magical transformation into fish, symbolizing the mother’s helplessness as children enter worlds she cannot follow. In “Anatomy Question”, he asks whether she would rather be a woman or a man, and she answers with a powerful affirmation of self: “I would always choose myself.”

These scattered appearances form a loose arc: the son moves from early childhood dependency (crying for food in “New House”) to a more questioning, independent preadolescent who challenges the speaker’s worldview. Each poem uses the son as a catalyst for the speaker’s interior reflection.

Motivations and Traits Shown Through Actions

The son’s motivations are those of a typical child: he wants play (skateboard), fairness (“Can you jest be nice?” in “Late Summer”), understanding of the world (the anatomy question), and connection with his mother (asking for her preference). His defining trait is innocence. When he mishears “abomination” as “a bomb in nation,” his confusion reveals a lack of exposure to hatred—a quality the mother both cherishes and worries about. His directness, such as asking for a different mother, shows a child’s unfiltered emotional honesty. In “The Worst Part,” his willingness to stroke fish and learn their language suggests openness and trust, in contrast to the mother’s fear.

(Note: These interpretations of his motivations are inferred from his words and the speaker’s reactions; the poems do not give him an interior voice.)

Chronological Arc

And Yet does not present a strict linear timeline, but the son’s appearances imply growth:

• Infancy/toddler: In “Young Mother”, the speaker carries a baby “like a spare appendage,” and in “Still Married”, she recalls “heavy car-seats and babies nursing.” These poems reference a son, though not exclusively.
• Early childhood: In “New House,” children cry for breakfast. The son is still dependent, requiring distraction.
• Middle childhood: “Late Summer in a Global Pandemic” shows him demanding a skateboard and a different mother—more assertive language. “On a Thursday Afternoon” shows him processing abstract concepts (gay, abomination). “The Worst Part” presents him at an age where he can walk to a river and transform.
• Preadolescence: “Anatomy Question” features a son old enough to ask a profound identity question.

This arc mirrors the speaker’s shift from survival-mode parenting to grappling with how to guide a child who is increasingly his own person.

Relationships

The central relationship is between the son and the speaker-mother. It is characterized by deep love, protective worry, and the recognition of growing distance. In “The Truth Is”, the speaker admits, “I don’t know what I’ve learned, isn’t that the problem?”—reflecting the inadequacy she feels in passing wisdom to her son. The son’s relationship with his father is rarely depicted; in “New House”, the father paints a wall pink while the mother deals with crying children, hinting at gendered parenting roles.

The son also has a relationship with a sister, referenced in “Late Summer in a Global Pandemic” where the mother refuses the daughter bad strawberries, and the children write a joint note. But the sister remains largely in the background.

Key Decisions and Consequences

Because the son is a child, his major decisions—such as asking for a different mother in “Late Summer in a Global Pandemic”—have emotional consequences for the speaker. That request deepens her exhaustion and sense of failure. In “On a Thursday Afternoon,” his decision to repeat his friend’s comment leads the speaker to prayer, showing how his words trigger her coping mechanisms. In “The Worst Part,” the sons choose to transform into fish, and the mother can only watch, highlighting the consequence of a child’s growing independence: it feels like loss.

The son’s most consequential action is his question in “Anatomy Question”: “If she could choose, would she be a woman or a man?” This forces the speaker to articulate her identity and provides a moment of clarity and affirmation. The consequence is a reaffirmation of self, which strengthens her as a mother.

(Interpretation: The son does not know the impact of his question; the consequence is felt by the speaker.)

Theme/Symbol Connections

The son is a vehicle for several themes explored on the site:

• Motherhood: He embodies the relentless demands and deep emotional labor of mothering. His presence in poems like “Young Mother” and “Still Married” anchors the collection’s exploration of that role.

• Gender Roles and Expectations: In “Anatomy Question,” the son’s query about gender triggers a statement of self-acceptance. It shows how even children absorb and question binary gender categories.

• Authenticity vs. Performance: When the son asks for a different mother in “Late Summer in a Global Pandemic,” he breaks the performance of maternal patience. His honesty forces the speaker to confront her own exhaustion. In “New House”, she claps and asks “Isn’t this fun” while the roof leaks—a performance the son sees through.

• Resilience and Perseverance: The son’s innocent mistakes and demands wear the speaker down, yet she continues. The child’s very existence requires her to persist. In “The Worst Part,” she screams for help despite knowing it’s futile—a symbol of maternal resilience even in loss.

• Digital Culture and Media Saturation: While the son does not directly engage with screens in the poems, his presence often contrasts with the digital noise the speaker experiences. In “Reasons to Log Off”, the speaker scrolls through a toxic feed; the son’s real-world, innocent interruptions (the cauliflower mispronunciation in “How to Be Happy”) momentarily ground her.

Symbolically, the son represents the future and the speaker’s hope for it. His misreadings of hateful language disarm that hate; his transformation into a fish suggests the child’s adaptability and the mother’s inability to prevent his entry into unknown waters. The son is also a “little cauldron” (from “And Yet”)—a container of both hope and fear.

5 Questions and Answers

1. How does the son’s mishearing of “abomination” in “On a Thursday Afternoon” function in the poem?

The son mishears “abomination” as “a bomb in nation.” This innocent error strips the word of its homophobic power, transforming hate into a question about literal explosives. It allows the poem to shift from exposing prejudice to offering a maternal prayer for children to listen attentively and for a receptive world. The mishearing suggests that children can unknowingly disarm harmful language, but it also underscores the mother’s role in interpreting and responding to that language.

2. What does the son’s question in “Anatomy Question” reveal about his character?

The son shows curiosity about identity and a trusting relationship with his mother, as he feels comfortable asking such a personal hypothetical. His question assumes she has a preference, indicating he sees gender as a choice—a view that reflects his yet-uncomplicated understanding. The question also reveals his desire to understand his mother beyond her role.

3. In “Late Summer in a Global Pandemic,” the son asks for a different mother. How does this moment fit into the collection’s themes?

This request directly confronts the theme of authenticity vs. performance. The son’s unfiltered expression breaks any illusion of perfect motherhood. It also connects to resilience and perseverance, as the speaker endures this hurtful but honest moment without retaliating. The poem captures the strain of pandemic parenting and the child’s inability to distinguish his frustration from a rejection of his caregiver.

4. What is the symbolic meaning of the sons’ transformation into fish in “The Worst Part”?

The transformation symbolizes the child’s entry into a world the mother cannot control or follow—a metaphorical representation of growing independence and the inevitability of change. The fish are creatures of a different element, suggesting the child will inhabit an interior or social world foreign to the parent. The other parents’ passive acceptance (“they choose to believe hope is the better thing to hold on to”) reflects the necessity of letting go. This poem echoes themes of motherhood and the grief inherent in watching a child grow away.

5. How does the son serve as a catalyst for the speaker’s self-discovery?

In “Anatomy Question,” the son’s question directly prompts the speaker to articulate that she would “always choose myself”—a statement of self-acceptance that contradicts the self-doubt she expresses elsewhere (e.g., “The Truth Is”). In other poems, his demands and misunderstandings force her to confront her limits, her anger, and her desire for solitude. The son’s presence repeatedly challenges her performance of motherhood and nudges her toward a more honest, integrated sense of self.