Chapter 39: Before and After — Summary, Themes, and Analysis
⚠️ Spoiler Warning: This guide contains detailed spoilers for the entire novel. Proceed only if you've finished reading or are comfortable knowing the plot.
Summary
In November 1963, Margaret is at the grocery store preparing for Thanksgiving when she learns that President Kennedy has been shot. She abandons her cart and drives to the elementary school to collect her children, Bobby and Suzy, and then picks up Beth from junior high. On the way home, Beth bluntly asks if the president will die; Margaret insists he'll be fine, unable to imagine otherwise. That evening, the family gathers with friends—Helen, Edwin, Bitsy, Charlotte, Viv, and baby Betty—to watch the funeral coverage. The image of John-John saluting his father's casket deeply moves everyone, but Walt abruptly leaves the room. Margaret follows and finds him in the kitchen, where he claims he needed a break.
That night, unable to sleep, Walt confesses to Margaret that he feels ashamed of his life. He admires Kennedy's accomplishments—the Peace Corps, civil rights, the space program—and contrasts them with his own perceived lack of achievement. Margaret, in turn, admits she regrets the constraints she placed on Walt's career, pushing him into accounting when he might have pursued philosophy. They begin a long, honest conversation about what they truly want, setting aside the scripts they've followed. Margaret retrieves a notepad and pen, and they start making lists. This conversation stretches on for months.
By early June of the following year, Walt and Margaret are ready to act. Walt finds a rubber mallet, Margaret carries a red-and-white “For Sale” sign, and they walk to the front lawn. Margaret kneels to steady the sign while Walt raises the mallet. She reflects on the house—her dream house when they first moved in—and the birch trees she never loved. She realizes dreams can change, and that someone else will love this house. She smiles at Walt and says, “I'm sure.”
Key Events
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Margaret learns of President Kennedy's shooting while shopping and immediately collects her children from school.
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The family and friends watch the funeral coverage; John-John's salute deeply affects Walt, who leaves the room.
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That night, Walt confesses his shame about his life's accomplishments, and Margaret admits her regret about limiting his career.
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They begin a months-long conversation about what they truly want, using lists and honest dialogue.
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In June 1964, they prepare to sell their house, hammering a “For Sale” sign into the lawn, ready for a new direction.
Character Development
Margaret undergoes a significant shift. She moves from a woman who followed societal expectations—supporting her husband's practical career, valuing the dream house—to someone who questions those scripts. Her earlier realization that “there are a million good and right ways to be a woman” now extends to men as well. She initiates the conversation with Walt, pushing him to articulate his desires and admitting her own role in stifling his dreams. Her willingness to sell the house symbolizes her embrace of change and her commitment to a partnership built on mutual authenticity.
Walt reveals a vulnerable side. He has always been the steady provider, but the president's death forces him to confront his own mortality and unfulfilled ambitions. His shame about not having done “something” with his life is a raw admission. Yet he also affirms that marrying Margaret was the one decision he never regretted. His participation in the long conversation shows his openness to reimagining their future together.
The Bettys (Bitsy, Viv, Charlotte) provide a supportive counterpoint. Bitsy expresses second thoughts about vet school, and Viv and Charlotte encourage her to be brave. Margaret reminds them all of their strength, and they reaffirm their bond as “the Bettys.” This moment underscores the theme of friendship as a source of resilience.
Themes, Symbols, or Motifs
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Before and After: The chapter explicitly frames Kennedy's assassination as a dividing line in history and in personal lives. For Margaret and Walt, it becomes a catalyst for reevaluating everything.
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Collective Trauma and Mortality: The funeral coverage and John-John's salute bring mortality home. Walt's reaction shows how public tragedy can trigger private introspection.
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Societal Expectations vs. Authentic Living: Margaret and Walt realize they've been following a “script” written by others. Their conversation is a rebellion against that script, seeking a life that reflects their true desires.
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Marriage Partnership: The chapter portrays marriage as a dynamic partnership where both partners must support each other's dreams. Margaret's regret and Walt's confession lead to a collaborative reimagining of their future.
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Letting Go and New Beginnings: The “For Sale” sign symbolizes letting go of the past—the dream house, the old life—to make room for something new. Margaret's reflection on the birch trees she never loved reinforces the idea that not everything we hold onto is worth keeping.
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Strength in Adversity: The Bettys' exchange about being “tough tea bags” highlights how hardship reveals inner strength.
Why This Chapter Matters
This chapter is a turning point for Margaret and Walt's marriage and for Margaret's personal journey. It connects the public trauma of Kennedy's assassination to private, transformative reflection. The chapter shows that major life changes often begin with a single honest conversation. Margaret's willingness to question the “shoulds” and to invite Walt into that questioning demonstrates her growth from a woman who once valued security above all to one who values authenticity and partnership. The decision to sell the house is a concrete action that sets up the next phase of their lives, and it resonates with the book's broader themes of women (and men) breaking free from societal constraints. It also reinforces the importance of the Bettys as a support network, showing that friendship sustains them through change.
Study Questions and Answers
1. How does the assassination of President Kennedy serve as a catalyst for Margaret and Walt's personal transformation?
The assassination forces them to confront mortality and the brevity of life. Walt's shame about his accomplishments and Margaret's regret about limiting his career surface because the tragedy makes them question whether they are living authentically. The public event becomes a private mirror, prompting them to ask what they truly want and to begin a months-long conversation that leads to selling their house and pursuing a new direction.
2. What does Margaret's reflection on the birch trees reveal about her character and her readiness for change?
Margaret never loved the birch trees, yet she acknowledges they are lovely now. This reflects her ability to see things as they are, not as she once wished them to be. Her willingness to let go of the house—and the trees—shows she has accepted that dreams can change and that someone else will love what she couldn't. It signals her emotional readiness to move forward without clinging to the past.
3. How does the chapter challenge traditional gender roles in marriage?
Margaret admits she pushed Walt into accounting, a “practical” career, and now regrets it. She realizes that the same pressure to conform to societal expectations that she has fought against as a woman also applies to men. By asking Walt what he truly wants and inviting him to co-create their future, she redefines their marriage as a partnership of equals, where both partners' dreams matter.
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