Family Expectations and Parental Influence in Second First Impressions
The Weight of Inheritance: Family Expectations and Parental Influence in Second First Impressions
In Sally Thorne's Second First Impressions, the central thematic claim is that family expectations and parental influence—whether delivered through religious guilt, public shame, or the fractures of a blended family—are the primary forces that shape a character's fears, ambitions, and life choices. The novel argues that these inherited pressures are not merely background noise; they are the invisible architecture of the characters' personalities, dictating how they love, work, and see themselves. The narrative traces this influence through the lives of Ruthie Midona, Teddy Prescott, and the Parloni sisters, showing how each character must confront and ultimately redefine the legacy their parents have left them.
Ruthie Midona: The Reverend's Daughter and the Burden of Perfection
Ruthie's entire identity is constructed in response to her father, a reverend whose moral authority looms over her life. The most direct evidence of this influence is her past relationship with Adam, a devout young man who, after an intimate encounter with Ruthie, went to her father for counseling. This act transformed a private romantic moment into a public moral failing, one that Ruthie's father apparently judged harshly. The outline notes that this event is a key part of her backstory, and it explains why Ruthie's relationship with her parents is so fraught. She is not merely a daughter; she is the reverend's daughter, a role that carries an implicit expectation of moral perfection.
This pressure manifests in Ruthie's daily life as a series of compulsive behaviors. She is a "door locker," a detail Melanie Sasaki observes and gently mocks. Ruthie's need to check and recheck locks is a physical manifestation of her anxiety, a way of imposing control on a world where her personal choices have been judged and found wanting. Her phone call with her parents in Chapter Eight is a masterclass in this dynamic. She calls to share her news about being acting manager, but her father immediately deflects, asking only if she remembered to lock the office. Her mother, meanwhile, treats her as a perpetual fifteen-year-old, warning her against letting a boy into her home. Ruthie's internal monologue reveals the cost: "It's the sensation of being repelled, then clutched too tight." This is the core of her parental influence—a push-and-pull that leaves her feeling both unseen and over-scrutinized.
The shame from her past with Adam also explains her initial resistance to the Sasaki Method. Melanie's plan to create a dating profile forces Ruthie to confront the idea that she is allowed to want love. Ruthie's fear is not of dating itself, but of the judgment that will follow. She has internalized her father's disapproval, and she anticipates it in every potential romantic encounter. Her dream of leaving Providence is constantly deferred because she cannot imagine a version of herself that exists outside her parents' expectations. As she tells Teddy in Chapter Twenty-One, "Take it from someone who had a dream once and never pursued it." That abandoned dream is a direct casualty of the familial pressure to be safe, dutiful, and beyond reproach.
Teddy Prescott: The Love Child and the Politics of Inheritance
Teddy's story is a parallel exploration of how parental choices can define a child's sense of self. He is the product of his father Jerry's second marriage, a "love child" who did not meet his four half-sisters until he was eight years old. The outline and evidence from Chapter Twenty-Three reveal the devastating circumstances of his introduction: his mother, drunk, interrupted Jerry and Dianne's vow renewal ceremony to expose the affair, blowing up the marriage. Teddy was then walked into a living room of confused, grieving girls and told he was their new brother before his father left to take a work call. This is the foundational trauma of his life—a moment of public shame and private wreckage that he did not cause but for which he is blamed.
This backstory explains Teddy's complex relationship with his father and his half-sister Rose. He is not the spoiled, entitled Prescott heir that Ruthie initially assumes. Instead, he is acutely aware that he is not "entitled" to anything. He tells Ruthie, "I'm not entitled," and this is a literal statement about his birth status. He has spent his life trying to prove he is not a threat, even as Rose treats him like a guard dog growling at an intruder. Rose's hostility is itself a product of parental influence: she fears Teddy will one day claim his father's seat, a fear that Jerry's own favoritism and neglect have cultivated. Teddy's ambition to open his own tattoo studio is not just a career goal; it is an attempt to build an identity entirely separate from the Prescott name and its tangled inheritance.
The symbol of the give-and-take knuckle tattoos is central to understanding Teddy's philosophy. He is a tattoo artist, and his art is a way of claiming his own body and story. The tattoos represent a transaction—a give and take—that is the opposite of the forced, one-sided inheritance he received from his father. He has a rose tattooed on himself, a permanent mark of his love for his sister, even though she refuses to acknowledge him. This act of devotion is a choice, not an obligation, and it stands in stark contrast to the family bonds that were imposed on him. Teddy's journey is about learning that he can define his own worth, independent of his father's approval or Rose's suspicion.
The Parloni Sisters: A Legacy of Secrecy and Defiance
Renata and Aggie Parloni offer a third perspective on parental influence, one that shows how family expectations can be defied, but only at a great cost. The outline and Chapter Twenty-Seven evidence reveal the novel's central twist: the Parlonis are not sisters, but a long-term romantic couple. They have lived their entire lives under the assumption that they are sisters, a lie that was born from a need for self-preservation. Renata explains to Ruthie, "Your father is a reverend. At first we didn't say, because I didn't want to find out that you're a jerk." This is a direct acknowledgment of how religious and social expectations have forced them into a lifetime of secrecy.
The "old wound" they carry is that they could not go to the prom together. This small, seemingly trivial event represents the larger denial of their relationship. They have been denied the public acknowledgment, the simple joys, and the social validation that other couples take for granted. Their parental influence is not from a specific parent, but from a culture of expectation that has taught them to hide. Their decision to finally appear together at the Christmas party, hand in hand, is a powerful act of defiance. It is a rejection of the shame that was imposed on them, and it serves as a catalyst for Ruthie's own awakening. When Renata tells Ruthie, "You're starting to realize that life is too short," she is passing on a hard-won lesson about the cost of living for others' expectations.
The golden bonnet tortoises are a fitting symbol for the Parlonis. These slow, ancient creatures are endangered, just as the Parlonis' love has been endangered by a world that does not accommodate them. Ruthie's job of moving them off the path is a small act of preservation, a way of protecting something precious from being crushed. It mirrors her growing desire to protect the Parlonis' secret and, later, to celebrate their truth. The tortoises represent the fragile, slow-blooming love that can survive only if someone is willing to care for it.
Complexity and Contradiction: The Cost of Defiance
The novel does not present a simple solution to the problem of parental influence. Instead, it shows that defiance comes with its own costs. Ruthie's journey is not about rejecting her parents entirely; it is about learning to separate their expectations from her own desires. She does not stop loving her parents, but she begins to see them as flawed people. Her mother's endless charity work, which Ruthie admires, is also a form of avoidance—a way of giving pieces of herself to strangers because she cannot confront the silence in her own home. Ruthie's father, meanwhile, is not a villain but a man who has retreated into his role as a reverend, unable to connect with his daughter as a person.
Teddy's story is similarly complex. He loves his father, but he is also deeply wounded by Jerry's neglect. Jerry's philosophy, "Life is change," is a convenient excuse for his own irresponsibility. He has moved through life leaving wreckage behind, and Teddy has had to clean it up. Yet Teddy does not hate his father; he simply wants to be seen. His decision to stay in Providence, to potentially give up his dream, is a moment of profound contradiction. He is torn between the ambition his father's neglect has instilled in him and the new, unexpected love he has found with Ruthie. The novel suggests that true freedom comes not from escaping one's family, but from understanding the ways they have shaped you and choosing which parts of that inheritance to keep.
The dream girl motorcycle is a symbol of this tension. It represents Teddy's dream of escape, of a life on the open road, free from the weight of the Prescott name. But it is also the vehicle that brings him to Providence and to Ruthie. The motorcycle is both a means of leaving and a means of arriving. Similarly, the always and forever sign that appears in the novel represents the promise of a lasting love, a commitment that stands in opposition to the transient, changeable nature of Jerry's philosophy. It is a symbol of the new family that Ruthie and Teddy are building, one based on choice rather than obligation.
Study Questions and Answers
1. How does Ruthie's relationship with her father, the reverend, directly shape her fear of romantic intimacy?
Ruthie's fear of intimacy is rooted in her past relationship with Adam, who went to her father for counseling after their intimate encounter. This event turned a private moment into a public moral failing, and Ruthie internalized her father's judgment. She now anticipates disapproval in every romantic situation, which is why she is so hesitant to embrace the Sasaki Method and why she initially resists her feelings for Teddy. Her compulsive door-locking is a physical manifestation of this anxiety, a need to control her environment because she cannot control how her choices will be judged.
2. In what ways does Teddy's status as a "love child" from his father's second marriage define his relationship with his half-sister Rose?
Teddy's status as a love child means he is not legally or emotionally "entitled" to the Prescott inheritance, a fact he states explicitly. Rose, however, is paranoid that he will one day claim his father's seat, a fear that Jerry's own behavior has cultivated. Rose treats Teddy like a threat, a guard dog growling at an intruder, because she has been raised to see him as a rival. Teddy's attempts to connect with her, such as getting a rose tattoo, are rebuffed because Rose cannot see past the family politics that have defined their relationship.
3. How does the revelation that the Parlonis are not sisters complicate the theme of family expectations?
The Parlonis' secret reveals that family expectations can be so powerful that they force people to live entire lives in hiding. Their relationship was denied public acknowledgment because of the fear of judgment, a fear directly tied to religious and social norms. Their decision to appear together at the Christmas party is a defiant act that shows the cost of living for others' expectations. It also serves as a lesson for Ruthie, who realizes that life is too short to let fear dictate her choices.
4. What role does the symbol of the golden bonnet tortoises play in the novel's exploration of family and preservation?
The golden bonnet tortoises are endangered creatures that Ruthie must move off the path to protect. They symbolize the fragile, slow-blooming love that exists in the novel—the Parlonis' secret relationship, Ruthie's growing feelings for Teddy, and the community of Providence itself. Ruthie's act of moving them is a small act of preservation, a way of protecting something precious from being crushed. It mirrors her desire to protect the people and places she loves from the bulldozer of Prescott Development's plans.
5. How does the novel suggest that characters can break free from parental influence without rejecting their families entirely?
The novel suggests that breaking free from parental influence requires understanding, not rejection. Ruthie does not stop loving her parents, but she begins to see them as flawed people whose expectations are not the final word on her worth. Teddy does not hate his father, but he learns to define his own identity separate from the Prescott name. The Parlonis do not seek revenge on the society that forced them into hiding; they simply choose to live openly. The novel's resolution suggests that true freedom comes from acknowledging the past's influence while choosing which parts of that inheritance to keep and which to leave behind.