Chapter summaries Ruthless Vows Rebecca Ross

Forget Me Not — Chapter 37 Summary: Memory, Loss, and What Remains

⚠️ Spoiler Warning: This guide contains detailed spoilers for the entire novel. Proceed only if you've finished reading or are comfortable knowing the plot.

Summary

The chapter opens with Roman and Iris kissing in the garden, pressed against a tree. The moment is intense and familiar—Roman notes that she tastes exactly as he remembers—but it is interrupted when Iris spots a torch beam sweeping the neighboring property. They suspect it might be Bruce, but neither wants to find out. Roman takes her hand and leads her back through the shadows to the estate, climbing the trellis and crossing the roof to slip into his bedroom.

Once inside, with the window closed and curtains drawn, the room feels like a haven where no god can find them. Iris immediately gravitates to his bookshelves, admiring the gilded spines and teasing him about owning six thesauruses, half of which were inherited from his grandfather. She then moves to his wardrobe, where she recalls that her letters first came to him. Roman admits that the paper made such a mess on his floor that he had no choice but to read what she wrote. Iris confesses she is surprised he did not run from her then, and he replies that her words only drew him closer.

She asks to borrow one of his shirts to sleep in and comments that his bed looks like a one-person bed. Roman teases her, insisting it can fit the two of them. She lies down on the mattress, joking that she has always wanted to sleep on a cloud and warning him that she steals blankets. Roman smiles, remembering that he knows this from experience—from the night before the world fell apart, when they were together in utter darkness, discovering each other slowly on a pallet of blankets.

He joins her on the bed, and they lie facing each other, tracing one another's faces. Roman asks if she can sense the changes beneath his skin, the cracks and wounds. She touches the hollow of his throat, and he returns the caress, following the bridge of her nose, the bow of her lips, the waves of her hair. They both acknowledge that they are not the same people who first gave each other their vows.

As his hand drifts down her body, he discovers something concealed in her coat: a small green volume with a bird embossed on the cover, and folded within its leaves, a blue envelope. He recognizes it with a wince—it is Dacre's letter. Iris tells him he can read it, and he does, his blood pounding hot in his veins. Dacre's words paint Iris as a bird to collect and keep in a cage, a bird that should sing only for him. Roman hates that Dacre is trying to draw her in.

Iris confesses that Dacre has a way with words, and if she did not know his true nature, he might have fooled her. But she has an answer for him. She plucks the letter from Roman's hand with a defiant tilt of her chin, declares that Dacre will never have her, tears the letter into shreds, and flushes it down the toilet.

When she emerges, she asks about his lavatory, marveling at the size of his shower. Roman offers to let her test it, and she accepts. In the shower, Iris slips his leather braces off his shoulders and begins to unbutton his shirt, but pauses halfway down. Roman stiffens, worried that the flash of his pale skin is making her hesitate—his sharp angles, the concave curve of his stomach, the prominence of his ribs, the scars that mar his leg. There was never enough food among Dacre's forces, and hunger had become his closest companion. His scars are a map he has traced over and over in loneliness.

Iris breaks the tension by realizing he already showered tonight, and he admits he can still join her. She smiles and continues unbuttoning his shirt. In the shower, Roman washes her hair, kneading the shampoo until it foams, and draws circles on her back with soap. Iris reflects on how she used to hate him at the Gazette, and Roman grins, noting where that disdain has brought her.

When Iris turns to face him, Roman's gaze drops to her legs, where he notices the bruises and scabs on her knees. He remembers watching her run through the meadow of Hawk Shire, dodging gunshots, being carried away by a motorcar. He sinks to his knees before her, touching those tender marks, pressing his face to her legs, tracing her bruises with his lips.

Iris whispers that she was so worried they would never have another moment like this again. She reflects on how strange it is that someone like her has found someone like him, and wonders if she had never written that essay and sent it to the Gazette on a whim, would they still be here? Roman kisses the curve of her knee and answers that he would have still found her, even if she had never written that essay.

The hot water runs out three minutes later. Roman shuts off the valve as frigid water sluices over them, and he carries her from the shower. When Iris wraps her legs around his waist and kisses him, Roman decides that, for the first time in his life, he prefers to live in the moment. He lays her down on the bed, and as the stars burn beyond the window, he reflects that even if he woke in the deepest region of Dacre's realm, forgetting every word he ever wrote, he would never forget the scent of Iris's skin, the sound of her voice, the way she looked at him. He thinks: there is no magic above or below that will ever steal this from him again.

Key Events

  • Roman and Iris share an intimate kiss in the garden until a torch beam interrupts them, forcing a retreat to his bedroom.

  • Iris explores Roman's bookshelves and wardrobe, reconnecting with the letters she once sent him.

  • Roman discovers Dacre's letter hidden in a book in Iris's coat and reads it.

  • Iris defiantly tears up Dacre's letter and flushes it, declaring he will never have her.

  • The couple enters the shower together, where Roman washes Iris's hair and notices the bruises on her knees.

  • Roman kneels to kiss Iris's bruises, and they discuss how they found each other.

  • The hot water runs out, and Roman carries Iris to bed.

  • The chapter ends with Roman's resolve that no magic will ever steal this from him again.

Character Development

Roman reveals deep vulnerability in this chapter. His fear that Iris will hesitate at the sight of his body—his ribs, his concave stomach, his scars—shows how the deprivation of Dacre's forces has marked him physically and emotionally. His scars are described as a map he has traced in loneliness, and shame wells in his throat when he anticipates her reaction. Yet his decision to live in the moment, rather than plan or worry, marks a significant shift in his character. He also demonstrates his devotion by kneeling to kiss Iris's bruises, treating them as evidence of her strength and bravery.

Iris shows her defiance and agency. She does not merely reject Dacre's letter; she physically destroys it, flushing it down the toilet. Her declaration that Dacre will never have her is a clear statement of her autonomy. She also shows vulnerability, confessing her fear that she and Roman would never have another moment like this, and reflecting on the role of chance in their meeting. Her philosophical turn—wondering if she had never written that essay, would they still be here—reveals her awareness of how fragile their connection is.

Their relationship deepens through mutual recognition. They both acknowledge that they are not the same people who first gave each other their vows, yet this only makes them ache for each other more. The chapter emphasizes seeing and being seen: Roman wants Iris to see him, and she does, with eyes open and shut.

Themes, Symbols, or Motifs

Forget me not / memory: The chapter title directly invokes this theme. Roman's final reflection—that he could forget his own name and every word he ever wrote, but never the scent of Iris's skin or the sound of her voice—frames memory as the ultimate anchor of identity and love.

Letters and written words: The chapter is bookended by written words. Iris's letters first drew Roman to her, and Dacre's letter threatens to pull her away. The destruction of Dacre's letter is a symbolic rejection of his claim on her. Roman's earlier line that her words drew him to her reinforces the power of written communication.

Defiance against Dacre: Iris's tearing and flushing of Dacre's letter is a physical act of rebellion. Her words—that Dacre will never have her—are a direct challenge to his divine authority.

Sanctuary and safety: Roman's bedroom is described as a haven where no god can find them. The closing of the window and drawing of the curtains create a boundary between the divine threat and their intimacy.

Vulnerability and shame: Roman's fear of Iris seeing his body—his ribs, his scars, his concave stomach—highlights how deprivation has shaped his self-image. His shame is a counterpoint to the intimacy of the shower scene.

Scars and bodily evidence: Roman's scars are a map of his suffering, while Iris's bruises are evidence of her escape from Hawk Shire. Both are physical markers of their separate ordeals, and Roman's kissing of her bruises is an act of reverence for her survival.

Hunger and deprivation: Roman's thinness is directly tied to the lack of food among Dacre's forces. Hunger has become his closest companion, a constant reminder of his captivity.

Fate versus choice: Iris's question about whether they would have found each other without her essay raises the tension between chance and destiny. Roman's answer—that he would have found her anyway—asserts a kind of fate, but it is a fate rooted in his choice to seek her.

Living in the moment: Roman's decision to prefer living in the moment, for the first time in his life, marks a departure from his usual careful planning. It is a conscious embrace of the present over the past or future.

Cages and imprisonment: Dacre's letter frames Iris as a bird to collect and keep in a cage. This motif of imprisonment contrasts with the freedom Roman and Iris find in each other's arms.

Why This Chapter Matters

This chapter is a turning point in the romance between Roman and Iris. It moves their relationship from reunion to reconnection, allowing them to see each other's physical and emotional scars and to choose each other anyway. The destruction of Dacre's letter is a decisive act of defiance that sets the stage for the conflicts to come. Roman's final reflection—that no magic will ever steal this from him again—establishes his commitment to Iris as an unbreakable force, even against divine power. The chapter also deepens the novel's exploration of memory, identity, and the ways love can anchor a person against overwhelming odds.

Study Questions and Answers

1. Why does Iris choose to destroy Dacre's letter rather than keep it or respond to it?

Iris destroys the letter because it represents Dacre's attempt to claim her as his own. His words frame her as a bird to collect and keep in a cage, a creature that should sing only for him. By tearing it up and flushing it, Iris physically rejects his claim and asserts her autonomy. She tells Roman that Dacre has a way with words, but because she knows his true nature, she cannot be fooled. Her act of destruction is both a personal declaration and a symbolic defiance of divine authority.

2. How does Roman's physical appearance reflect his time with Dacre's forces, and how does Iris respond to it?

Roman's body bears the marks of deprivation: his ribs are prominent, his stomach is concave, and his legs are scarred. There was never enough food among Dacre's forces, and hunger became his constant companion. When Iris pauses while unbuttoning his shirt, Roman fears she is hesitating at the sight of his body. But Iris does not recoil; instead, she breaks the tension with a lighthearted comment about his shower, and they continue. Her acceptance of his scars and thinness is an act of love that counters his shame.

3. What does Roman mean when he says he would have still found Iris even if she had never written that essay?

Iris wonders if their meeting was a matter of chance—if she had never written her essay and sent it to the Gazette, would they have found each other? Roman's answer asserts that their connection is not dependent on that single event. He would have found her anyway, suggesting that their bond is rooted in something deeper than circumstance. This answer reinforces the theme of fate versus choice, and it reassures Iris that their love is not fragile or accidental.

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