Chapter summaries My Darling Dreadful Thing Johanna van Veen

Chapter 23 Summary and Analysis

⚠️ Spoiler Warning: This guide contains detailed spoilers for the entire novel. Proceed only if you've finished reading or are comfortable knowing the plot.

Summary

The chapter opens with the narrator confined to bed for several days while she regains her strength after the injury to her hand. Despite the pain and weakness, she describes these days as very happy, filled with a restless anticipation. She repeatedly wonders when Thomas's spirit will rise from the bog, comparing her feeling to the excitement she felt as a child before her birthday or Saint Nicholas's day, when guests would bring her small presents.

Ruth cautions the narrator against this hope, pointing out that it took Ruth herself centuries to wake and that Thomas may never become a spirit at all. The narrator counters that she gave Thomas a taste of her blood when she cut her hand on the wheelbarrow, suggesting this might hasten his awakening. Ruth reminds her that she has already bound Ruth to her, and the narrator asks whether there is a limit to how many spirits a person can bind. Ruth says she does not know but finds the idea distasteful.

Peter visits frequently, bringing small gifts: the skull of a small woodland animal, a dead butterfly, a piece of quartz, a crow's feather, several small vertebrae, a piece of glass worn smooth, and coins covered in verdigris. When the narrator asks how long it took him to become a spirit, Peter says he does not remember, explaining that sometimes he woke and then slumbered again. The narrator takes this as evidence that Thomas might wake sooner than Ruth predicts, but Ruth dismisses it, noting Peter is much older than she is. When Ruth jokes that perhaps they should all scream over Thomas's body, Peter responds sharply with a single word—don't—and leaves without explanation. The narrator notes she has never heard him angry before.

Each evening, Agnes changes the narrator's bandages, assuring her the cut will leave a scar but no permanent damage. Agnes then helps the narrator wash her hair, which triggers a childhood memory of the narrator's mother bathing her at age five, with a newspaper boat bleeding purple ink into the water. The narrator asks Agnes whether her mother washed her hair like that, and Agnes explains that her family was poor, sharing a lavatory with five other families, and that her mother preferred to spend money on other things. The narrator asks whether other little girls also performed séances, and Agnes gently teases her, drawing a soapy line down her neck.

Agnes then cuts the narrator's hair, dividing it into sections and trimming it, before shaving the sides of her neck with a razor. During this intimate ritual, the narrator closes her eyes and imagines herself as Thomas, running through the chain of sensations she has constructed for him. In this fantasy, she is Thomas sitting in the chair while Agnes cuts his hair, and she teases Agnes, places her hand on Agnes's thigh, and pulls her onto his lap. When the narrator opens her eyes, she tells Agnes it is easy to love her. Agnes responds that few people would agree, and the narrator insists they are fools. Agnes embraces her from behind, kisses the top of her head, and tells her she smells nice. The narrator presses Agnes's hands against her breastbone, nursing what she calls the soft little pain of loving her.

The chapter closes with the twelfth case episode transcript, dated 25 October 1954. The doctor asks the patient about the ground-up glass. The patient explains she learned about powdered glass as a murder weapon from a mystery novel she read in the library, and that Ruth began grinding glass soon afterward. The doctor asks whether she ever came close to using it on her mother; the patient admits she thought about it often but never dared, saying she could not imagine a life without her. When the doctor asks why Mrs. K— was different and why she tried to kill her, the patient suddenly stands, sweeps the notebook, pencil, and cup of water off the table, and screams that the doctor does not understand. She continues screaming, scratching and biting herself, and the interview is suspended for the safety of both doctor and patient.

Key Events

  • The narrator convalesces in bed, feeling happy anticipation for Thomas's spirit to rise.

  • Ruth warns that spirits may take centuries to wake; the narrator hopes her blood will hasten Thomas's awakening.

  • Peter brings a series of natural objects as gifts and reveals he does not remember how long his own awakening took.

  • Peter becomes angry for the first time when Ruth jokes about screaming over Thomas's body.

  • Agnes changes the narrator's bandages and assures her the cut will scar but not cause permanent damage.

  • Agnes washes and cuts the narrator's hair, shaving her neck, during which the narrator imagines herself as Thomas.

  • The narrator tells Agnes it is easy to love her, and Agnes embraces her warmly.

  • The twelfth case episode reveals the patient learned about powdered glass from a mystery novel and that Ruth ground glass; the patient admits she considered using it on her mother but never dared.

  • When asked why she tried to kill Mrs. K—, the patient erupts in a violent outburst and the interview is suspended.

Character Development

The narrator (R—) is shown in a state of hopeful convalescence, her physical recovery paralleled by her emotional investment in Thomas's potential awakening. Her belief that her blood may have hastened his rise reflects her growing sense of agency over the supernatural forces around her. Her fantasy of being Thomas during the haircut reveals a deep identification with him, and her confession that it is easy to love Agnes marks a moment of vulnerability and openness.

Ruth continues to serve as the skeptical counterweight, grounding the narrator's hopes in the reality of how long spirits take to wake. Her grinding of glass, revealed in the case episode, connects her to the violence that will later be central to the narrator's story.

Peter is developed through his gifts and his brief flash of anger. His statement that he sometimes woke and slumbered again suggests a more complex relationship with awakening than Ruth's account allows, and his sharp refusal when Ruth jokes about Thomas shows a protective tenderness beneath his gentle demeanor.

Agnes is revealed through the care she provides and through her account of her impoverished childhood. Her teasing and physical affection toward the narrator deepen the intimacy between them, and her question about whether the narrator thought other girls had spirit companions suggests she knows more than she lets on.

Themes, Symbols, or Motifs

Blood as spiritual bond. The narrator's belief that her blood may wake Thomas echoes the earlier binding of Ruth and reinforces the idea that blood creates a supernatural connection between the living and the dead.

Anticipation and hope vs. skepticism. The narrator's childlike excitement about Thomas's awakening is repeatedly tempered by Ruth's realism, creating a tension between hope and expectation that runs through the chapter.

Identity transference. The narrator's fantasy of being Thomas during the haircut is a striking example of her tendency to inhabit his perspective, blurring the boundaries between herself and the spirit she loves.

Intimate care rituals. The washing, cutting, and shaving of the narrator's hair is rendered as an act of tenderness and trust, echoing the care Agnes presumably gave Thomas and deepening the bond between the two women.

Class disparity. Agnes's account of her impoverished childhood, sharing a lavatory with five other families, contrasts with the narrator's own memories and highlights the social divisions that shape their lives.

Powdered glass as a weapon. The case episode reveals the origin of the powdered glass—a mystery novel—and connects Ruth's grinding of glass to the narrator's later attempt on Mrs. K—'s life, linking the domestic and the violent.

Why This Chapter Matters

This chapter deepens the emotional core of the novel by showing the narrator's recovery and her growing intimacy with Agnes, while also advancing the supernatural plot through the question of whether Thomas will wake. The haircut scene, with its fantasy of being Thomas, is a pivotal moment of identity transference that complicates the narrator's relationship with both Thomas and Agnes. The case episode at the end reframes the entire chapter in a darker light, revealing that the narrator's story is being told from a psychiatric institution and that her actions—including the attempt on Mrs. K—'s life—are the subject of clinical investigation. The chapter thus balances tenderness with menace, hope with the knowledge of what is to come.

Study Questions and Answers

1. Why does the narrator believe her blood might wake Thomas, and how does Ruth respond?

The narrator believes that the blood she shed when she cut her hand on the wheelbarrow gave Thomas a taste of her blood, which she hopes will hasten his awakening. Ruth counters that it took her centuries to wake and that the naming and blood may merely bind spirits rather than wake them, pointing out that Peter is much older and his experience may not apply to Thomas.

2. What does the narrator's fantasy of being Thomas during the haircut reveal about her state of mind?

The fantasy shows the narrator's deep identification with Thomas, as she imagines herself in his body being cared for by Agnes. It reveals her desire to inhabit his perspective and her longing for the kind of intimacy she imagines they shared. The fantasy also blurs the boundaries between her love for Thomas and her love for Agnes, suggesting that her feelings for the two are intertwined.

3. How does the case episode at the end of the chapter change the reader's understanding of the narrator's story?

The case episode reveals that the narrator's account is being given to a doctor in a psychiatric setting, and that she has been accused of trying to kill Mrs. K— with powdered glass. Her admission that she considered using the glass on her mother but never dared, and her violent outburst when asked about Mrs. K—, suggest that her story is not simply a supernatural memoir but also a confession and a defense. The episode reframes the chapter's tenderness as the prelude to a violent act.

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