Chapter 23: Homesickness – Summary and Analysis
⚠️ Spoiler Warning: This guide contains detailed spoilers for the entire novel. Proceed only if you've finished reading or are comfortable knowing the plot.
Summary
Benny stands in her childhood bedroom, ignoring her brother Byron's calls from the hallway. She studies the turquoise walls she once insisted on painting, a memory that makes her smile and wonder why she didn't return to California sooner. She had delayed her visit, hoping to secure financing for her café and prove her parents wrong. While her mother was unknowingly near death from a blood clot, Benny was in New York, newly fired from a call center job.
The chapter flashes back to Benny's final day at work. After deviating from the script to agree with a customer about the environmental waste of disposable electronics, her supervisor overheard and fired her. Benny reflects on how she often adopted false names (like "Sondra") to please callers, but she believes honesty matters more than rules. After losing the job, she wanders into a coffee shop that reminds her of a diner she visited as a child with her father and brother. In that café, she feels a shift: her life is about to change. She vows to try once more to open her own café, offering her mother's black cake as a signature dessert. She also considers selling her drawings to make ends meet.
Back in the bedroom, Benny remembers her mother's voicemail: "Benedetta, please come home." She had decided to go home for winter, hoping for an apology or at least a conversation. But before she could act, her brother called, and now she is here too late. Leaning against the wall, she almost expects to see her mother or father walk in, as if none of the estrangement had happened.
Key Events
- Benny arrives at her parents' home and avoids Byron in the hallway, retreating to her old bedroom.
- She recalls painting the turquoise walls as a teenager.
- Flashback: Benny is fired from a call center for telling a customer about planned obsolescence and environmental degradation.
- She visits a café in New York that reminds her of a diner from her childhood with her father and brother.
- Inside the café, she resolves to try opening her own coffee shop, with black cake as a signature item.
- She considers selling artwork to supplement her income.
- She remembers her mother's voicemail asking her to come home and decides to return regardless of the outcome.
- The chapter ends with Benny longing for the past, hoping all the pain can be undone.
Character Development
Benny (Benedetta): This chapter deepens Benny's backstory and her internal conflict. She is nearly thirty-seven, still struggling financially after years of drifting. Her refusal to lie at work shows her integrity, but it also costs her a job. Her homesickness is not just for a place but for a time when her family was whole. She wants to prove she was right to follow her own path, yet she is also ready to reconcile with her mother. The chapter reveals her vulnerability and her creative talent (drawing) as a potential lifeline.
Joanie: Mentioned only briefly, but Benny's past relationship with Joanie highlights a pattern of avoidance: Benny never told her parents about Joanie, leading to resentment.
Byron: He is present offstage, calling to Benny, but she ignores him, signaling unresolved tension between the siblings.
Mother and Father: Benny's father died six years ago, and her mother is now dying. They appear in memories, shaping Benny's sense of "home." Her father's playful memory at the diner contrasts with later estrangement. Her mother's voicemail contains a plea that Benny now regrets not answering sooner.
Themes, Symbols, or Motifs
Homesickness: The title is embodied in Benny's longing for the house, the smells of bacon, the diner from childhood. Her homesickness is temporal as well as geographic—she misses a version of her family before estrangement.
Environmental ethics vs. corporate scripts: Benny's firing illustrates her refusal to lie about planned obsolescence. The script represents the inauthenticity she must adopt to survive, while her truth-telling costs her but earns the customer's gratitude.
Black cake as connection: Benny plans to serve her mother's black cake as the single winter dessert in her future café. The cake symbolizes heritage, family, and the hope of reconciliation through memory and food.
Delayed decisions: Benny repeatedly postponed her return home, hoping for perfect timing. The chapter underscores the cost of waiting: she arrives too late to speak with her mother.
Why This Chapter Matters
Chapter 23 provides crucial insight into Benny's character and her strained relationship with her family. It explains why she stayed away so long—fear of failure, pride, and a desire for forgiveness on her own terms. The flashback to her firing reinforces her independent morality and sets up the entrepreneurial dream she will pursue. The chapter also deepens the novel's central theme of missed opportunities and the weight of the past. By bookending the chapter with Benny in her childhood bedroom, Wilkerson emphasizes that the emotional distance between Benny and her mother was not just geographic but psychological.
Study Questions and Answers
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Why does Benny get fired from her call center job?
Benny is fired because she deviates from the script to agree with a customer about the environmental harm of disposable electronics. Her supervisor overhears and terminates her employment, though Benny believes the customer left satisfied. -
What does the coffee shop in New York represent for Benny?
The coffee shop reminds her of a diner from her childhood with her father and brother. It represents a lost sense of belonging and connection to her family. Inside, she decides to take one more shot at opening her own café, mirroring the warmth of that memory. -
How does the chapter portray Benny's feelings of guilt and regret?
Benny repeatedly reflects on why she didn't come home sooner—she was waiting for perfect news (a loan, a justification for her choices). Now, with her mother dying, she is left wishing she could undo time, leaning against the wall and hoping to see her mother appear as if nothing had changed.