Chapter 36: 31. Ryder – Campfire Confessions and Hidden Guilt
⚠️ Spoiler Warning: This guide contains detailed spoilers for the entire novel. Proceed only if you've finished reading or are comfortable knowing the plot.
Summary
Ryder and Colson are dumped on a remote highway by their bus as punishment for a penalty. They venture into the woods, build a campfire, and share a meager dinner. During the night, the co-captains move past hostility, discussing the team merger, lost teammates, and their personal baggage. Ryder reveals a traumatic foster-home memory involving hiding with siblings in the woods. Colson confesses his breakup with Gigi, admitting he cheated and still loves her. Ryder, who is secretly sleeping with Gigi, feels guilt but stays silent. They also bond over hockey superstitions and a bizarre story about a pig that was eaten. The campfire becomes a space for fragile truce and mutual vulnerability.
Key Events
- The bus leaves Ryder and Colson on the highway after their penalty, stranding them for the night.
- Colson initiates building a campfire, revealing his family's genuine camping experience.
- Ryder shares a painful childhood memory: he used to take foster siblings into the woods to escape a violent guardian.
- The two split a granola bar and chips, the only food available.
- Colson brings up their ongoing team rivalry, and they acknowledge the merger cost each of them a friend.
- The story of Patrick's phone mix-up (the "Kansas Kid") is told, leading to a discussion of superstitions.
- Colson reveals his breakup with Gigi, admitting he cheated and still thinks she's "the one."
- Ryder keeps secret his ongoing physical relationship with Gigi, feeling guilt but saying nothing.
Character Development
- Ryder: Shows rare vulnerability by recounting his foster-home trauma and why he knows how to build a fire. He demonstrates self-awareness (admitting "I usually am" a dick) and internal conflict as he hides his affair with Gigi. His silence at the end indicates a growing conscience.
- Colson: Evolves from a hostile, frustrated co-captain to a more open person. He admits he's "not usually such a dick" and shares his breakup pain. The chapter humanizes him, revealing his regret and lingering love for Gigi.
- Gigi (mentioned): Though not present, her past relationship with Colson and current secret affair with Ryder shape the emotional stakes.
Themes, Symbols, or Motifs
- Isolation and Vulnerability: The dark, empty highway and forest force the two rivals into an unplanned intimacy, stripping away team bravado.
- The Campfire as Connection: Building and maintaining the fire becomes a metaphor for the slow, careful work of building trust. It provides warmth and light in a cold, dark situation.
- Secrets and Guilt: Ryder's internal refrain "She's fucking me, bro" highlights the theme of hidden truth poisoning relationships. The chapter contrasts Colson's open confession with Ryder's concealment.
- Rivalry and Merger: Both characters lost teammates due to the Briar-Hastings merger. Their shared loss becomes a fragile bridge.
- Superstition and Team Culture: The pig story and Patrick's phone incident illustrate how random events become rituals that bind (or divide) a team.
Why This Chapter Matters
This chapter is a turning point in the Ryder–Colson arc. It moves them from open hostility to a grudging, tentative understanding. More importantly, it deepens the central love triangle: Colson's heartfelt confession about loving Gigi makes Ryder's secret affair feel increasingly unsustainable. The emotional weight of the campfire conversation sets up inevitable conflict and tests Ryder's conscience. It also provides backstory that explains why Ryder is guarded and why Colson has been acting out.
Study Questions and Answers
1. What traumatic experience from Ryder's past does he share with Colson, and why does it matter?
Ryder describes a foster home where the father was violent toward his wife. He would take his younger foster siblings into the woods with a tent to keep them safe, learning to build fires there. This revelation explains his survival skills, his emotional guardedness, and gives Colson (and the reader) a deeper understanding of Ryder's character.
2. How does the campfire scene symbolize the changing dynamic between the two co-captains?
The campfire is built together, requiring cooperation and trust. As the fire grows, their conversation becomes more personal. The shared act of kindling and feeding the flame mirrors their slow progress from enemies to tentative allies. The fire provides warmth against the cold night, just as their new openness provides emotional warmth.
3. Why does Ryder remain silent when Colson confesses his love for Gigi and his regret about cheating? What does this silence reveal?
Ryder cannot tell Colson the truth because it would expose his own affair and shatter the fragile trust they've built. His silence reveals his internal guilt and selfishness—he wants to continue his secret relationship with Gigi. It also shows his unwillingness to hurt Colson further, but it sets up a major conflict for future chapters.