Power Dynamics in Relationships: The Negotiation of Control in Problematic Summer Romance

Thematic Claim

In Problematic Summer Romance, Ali Hazelwood argues that power dynamics in romantic relationships are not static or unidirectional. Rather, they are continuously negotiated through vulnerability, direct confrontation, and the willingness to surrender control. The central tension between Maya Killgore and Conor Harkness does not stem from a fixed imbalance of age or wealth but from each character’s refusal to acknowledge the other’s full personhood. Conor leverages his age, experience, and self-appointed protector role to deny the possibility of a romantic relationship, while Maya consistently asserts her own desires and deploys ultimatums that force him to confront his fears. By the novel’s end, the power shifts from a hierarchical model—where the older, wealthier man holds all the cards—to an egalitarian partnership built on mutual trust and the conscious choice to be vulnerable.

Tracing the Theme Across the Plot

Conor’s Initial Power Play: Age as a Weapon

From the early chapters, Conor uses the fifteen‑year age gap as an absolute barrier. When Maya admits her attraction in Chapter 19, he responds, “You are twenty. I’m not. That’s the end of it,” and reduces her feelings to a rebound fueled by gratitude. He frames his refusal as ethical protection, yet his language betrays a deeper need for control: “[Our relationship] is hard to explain to others.” By insisting on a binary power differential—older/wiser vs. younger/naive—he denies Maya the agency to choose for herself. His father’s worldview, which Conor describes as “every relationship can be conceptualized in terms of power” (Conor’s father quote), haunts him; Conor tries to be the opposite of his father but inadvertently replicates the paternalistic pattern by assuming he must decide what is best for Maya.

This phase reaches its peak during the Greek theater scene. When a ticket seller mistakes Maya for Conor’s daughter, Conor seizes the moment as a “teachable moment,” his eyes carrying a hint of I told you so. Maya meets the challenge by cheekily calling him “Daddy,” deliberately unsettling him. She refuses to let his age‑based authority stand, planting the seed for a renegotiation.

Maya’s Counter‑Assertion: Reclaiming Agency

The Edinburgh confrontation in Chapter 19 is the turning point. Maya systematically dismantles each of Conor’s objections: she points out that he knew little about her as a teenager, that she is not seeking hero worship, and that his assumptions infantilize her. Her line, “If you are not interested in being with me, for any reason at all, then I’m going to drop this, no questions asked. No is a full sentence. But you’re not saying that,” strips away the mask of protection and reveals that Conor is not rejecting her but rather his own desire. She invokes his father’s toxic philosophy— “Isn’t it what your father thinks, Conor? That every relationship has to be conceptualized in terms of power?”—forcing him to see that his refusal is itself an act of domination.

Maya does not simply ask for what she wants; she demands that he treat her as an equal decision‑maker. In Chapter 22, she delivers an ultimatum: “You can ask me not to meet up with other guys. But what alternative will you offer?” This is not a powerless plea but a strategic move that shifts the burden of action onto Conor. By framing her desire as a negotiation rather than a request, she equalizes the playing field.

The Ultimatum and Its Consequences

The episode on the beach in Chapter 26 deepens the power struggle. Maya pushes Conor to admit he has been attracted to her since their first meeting in Edinburgh. When she says, “Tell me I’m wrong,” and he cannot lie, “something gives.” For the first time, he acknowledges the truth of his feelings, but he still tries to command her: “Go to your fucking room. Right now.” Yet Maya reads his tone correctly—it is not dismissal but desperation. She chooses to follow, but on her own terms, walking forward like Orpheus and listening for his steps. This moment of silent trust—she believes he will follow—marks the beginning of a reciprocal dynamic.

Still, Conor’s fear of the power imbalance resurfaces in Chapter 36 when he ends their friendship, citing a new girlfriend and the need for age‑appropriate relationships. His words “The way it’s structured makes it hard to explain to others” reveal that his concern is less about Maya’s wellbeing and more about social perception. Maya’s response is devastatingly clear: “So you are kicking me out of your life for someone you don’t even love.” She identifies that his power move (cutting her off) is actually a cowardly evasion. This rupture shows that power dynamics are not resolved by one conversation; they require sustained, painful renegotiation.

Resolution: Mutual Surrender and Commitment

The resolution in Chapters 42–43 completes the arc. Conor returns to Maya after sixteen days of silence and admits, “I need to be in the same country.” He moves her into his house—a gesture that offers him less control, not more. The proposal scene in the sunroom is the ultimate inversion: Conor kneels naked, vulnerable, and says Maya can “take years to decide.” He places the power to choose entirely in her hands. By accepting immediately, Maya signals that she no longer needs to fight for agency; she trusts the partnership they have built. Conor’s “Welcome home” in Chapter 42 is not the statement of a possessor but of a person who has surrendered the need to guard his heart.

Character and Symbol Connections

Characters as Power Mirrors

Conor and his father Finneas Harkness: Conor explicitly describes his father as someone who sees all relationships as wrestling matches. Conor’s arc is a deliberate rejection of that model. By the end, he chooses vulnerability over domination, proving that nurture can overcome nature.
Eli Killgore: Eli initially worries Conor is “taking advantage of [Maya’s] wide‑eyed youth,” but he later asks Maya, “Are you breaking his heart?” This reversal acknowledges Maya’s power in the relationship and signals that power dynamics are never one‑sided.
Avery: As Conor’s age‑appropriate ex‑girlfriend, Avery embodies the safe choice. Yet Maya’s friendship with Avery—bonding over the same travel guidebook—shows that power can be redefined through solidarity rather than competition.

Symbols of Equilibrium

Granita al caffè: The shared granita moments (e.g., during the volcanic ash disruption) are small pauses where age and money cease to matter. They represent a neutral space where Maya and Conor can connect as equals, outside the hierarchies of their daily lives.
Mount Etna: The volcano is a metaphor for the explosive, uncontrollable passion between the leads. Its real‑world unpredictability mirrors the power shifts in their relationship—neither can fully govern the other’s emotions.
Tiny the dog: Tiny’s constant need for care forces both characters into nurturing roles. The dog’s presence equalizes them: both are responsible for a vulnerable creature, and that shared duty blurs the lines of who leads and who follows.
Ice skating: Maya’s private skating sessions are her only space of total autonomy. When she tells Conor about it, she invites him into that space, giving him a glimpse of her power to self‑regulate and find joy alone.

Complexity and Contradiction

The novel refuses a simplistic “reverse the power” solution. Even after Conor admits his love, he struggles with ingrained guilt. In Chapter 19, he brings up her recent breakup and his wealth as reasons why she “can’t” want him—a classic deflection that masks his fear of being the villain of his own story. Maya’s repeated insistence that her consent is valid does not automatically erase the external realities of wealth and age. The narrative acknowledges that these differences exist but argues that they do not determine the relationship’s worth.

Another layer: Conor’s protectiveness, while sometimes patronizing, is also genuine care. When he buys the theater tickets, she slides his sunglasses over her nose; when he is helping Avery down the treacherous steps, his eyes are on Maya. This monitoring could be read as controlling, but the novel frames it as anxious devotion. The complexity lies in distinguishing between genuine protection and the abuse of power—a distinction that Hazelwood forces both characters (and readers) to examine case by case.

Furthermore, Maya’s power is not always healthy. She admits to “anger issues” and uses confrontation as a weapon. Her willingness to humiliate Conor (e.g., by singing a sea chantey in the car when she is jealous of Avery) shows that she, too, can wield power manipulatively. The story does not absolve her; it shows that both parties must evolve.

Study Questions and Answers

How does Conor’s relationship with his father shape his understanding of power in romance?
Answer: Conor’s father models a worldview where every interaction is a competition for dominance. Conor tries to avoid replicating that by refusing to date Maya at all, but in doing so he paradoxically dominates her by denying her agency. His arc involves learning that power can be shared rather than won.
Why does Maya reject Conor’s attempt to frame her attraction as a rebound or gratitude?
Answer: She insists that her desire is autonomous and not a product of her emotional history. By rejecting his framing, she reclaims the right to define her own motivations. This is a direct challenge to Conor’s assumption that he knows her better than she knows herself.
What role does the age gap play in the power dynamic, and is it ultimately resolved?
Answer: The age gap is used by Conor as a shield against intimacy. It is resolved not by ignoring the gap but by acknowledging it without letting it dictate the relationship’s terms. Maya accepts his age as part of him, and Conor accepts that her youth does not equal incapacity. The final proposal scene symbolically erases the gap because Conor offers complete vulnerability.
How does the symbol of Mount Etna reflect the characters’ struggle for control?
Answer: Etna erupts unpredictably, disrupting travel and forcing the characters to be stranded together. This mirrors the way intense emotion erupts and disrupts their carefully managed distance. The volcano cannot be controlled—just as Conor cannot control his growing feelings for Maya, and Maya cannot control the volcanic impact of her own desire.
What does the final scene of the proposal reveal about the power balance?
Answer: Conor proposes naked, without protection or pretense, and tells Maya she can take years to decide. He explicitly places the power to say yes or no in her hands. Maya’s immediate acceptance shows that she no longer needs to fight for agency; the struggle is over because both have chosen to be equally vulnerable. The power dynamic transforms from a zero‑sum game to a mutual surrender.