Chapter Eighteen: Some Other Girl I Would Never Want to Be

⚠️ Spoiler Warning: This guide contains detailed spoilers for the entire novel. Proceed only if you've finished reading or are comfortable knowing the plot.

Summary

After the cafeteria confrontation, Zetian is escorted alone into Li Shimin’s cell. Sima Yi managed to reduce Shimin’s solitary confinement from three days to one, citing “special circumstances.” Zetian collapses onto the bed but soon feels unnerved by the silence. She searches for distraction and discovers feminine hygiene items under the sink—items she now understands belonged to Shimin’s deceased first partner, Wende. Earlier, during afternoon lessons with Sima Yi, Zetian pried for information about Wende. Sima Yi revealed only that Wende was powerful enough to initially activate the Vermilion Bird with Shimin using a rare King-class Hundun husk, but she died in their first real battle.

Zetian scrubs off her makeup and finds a bag of painkilling herbs that belonged to Wende. She feels a ghostly presence but dismisses it, muttering to herself. Suddenly, a pounding on the bunker door startles her. A man forces his way in, pulls a hood over her head, and attacks her. He chokes her, saying, “This is for Colonel Yang.” It is Xing Tian, pilot of the Headless Warrior, seeking revenge. Zetian struggles but is overpowered. Just as she is about to black out, a voice shouts at the attacker. Xing Tian flees, and the newcomer reveals himself as Yizhi, a student strategist who came to her aid.

Key Events

Zetian is locked alone in Shimin’s cell and experiences psychological unease.
She learns from Sima Yi that Shimin’s previous pilot-partner, Wende, died in battle.
Zetian finds painkilling herbs belonging to Wende and senses a ghostly presence.
Xing Tian breaks into the cell and attempts to strangle Zetian as revenge for Colonel Yang.
Yizhi rescues Zetian, driving Xing Tian away.

Character Development

Zetian: Shows vulnerability and a rare moment of fear; her usual defiance gives way to raw survival instinct. She also feels a strange connection to Wende, acknowledging the legacy of the girls who came before her.
Yizhi: Emerges as a proactive ally, physically intervening to save Zetian despite his usual role as a strategist. This marks him as someone willing to defy the system.
Xing Tian: Confirms the depth of resentment among pilots toward Zetian; his personal revenge motive demonstrates the lethal consequences of her actions.

Themes, Symbols, or Motifs

Isolation and fear: The silence of the concrete cell amplifies Zetian’s anxiety, contrasting with her earlier crowded existence.
The ghost(s) of the past: Wende’s lingering presence—through the herbs and Zetian’s imagination—represents the erased history of concubine-pilots. Zetian even speculates that dead pilots might reincarnate into Hunduns.
Debt and revenge: Xing Tian’s attack ties directly to Zetian’s killing of Colonel Yang, showing how personal feuds drive the pilot hierarchy.
Solidarity through intervention: Yizhi’s rescue underscores that Zetian is not entirely alone; small acts of defiance against the system can come from unexpected quarters.

Why This Chapter Matters

This chapter strips Zetian of her usual bravado, exposing her as physically vulnerable and emotionally unsettled. It deepens the mystery around Li Shimin’s past and introduces the concept of previous partners—Wende—whose death haunts the narrative. The attack by Xing Tian raises the stakes, proving that Zetian’s enemies are many and willing to act outside official channels. Yizhi’s rescue establishes him as a critical ally and hints at a growing resistance network among the student strategists. The chapter also reinforces the novel’s critique of a system that sacrifices girls and then erases their memory.

Study Questions and Answers

Why does Zetian feel uneasy being alone in the cell?
She has grown accustomed to constant danger and companionship; the sudden silence and isolation remind her of her mortality. Additionally, the presence of Wende’s belongings makes her feel observed by a ghost, heightening her fear.
What does Xing Tian’s attack reveal about the politics among pilots?
It shows that personal grudges and revenge override official discipline. Xing Tian’s targeting of Zetian for killing his friend Colonel Yang indicates that the pilot corps is rife with internal conflict and that Zetian’s actions have made her enemies beyond the official enemy.
How does Yizhi’s intervention change Zetian’s perception of strategists?
Previously, Zetian viewed strategists as detached academics who stood by while pilots fought. Yizhi’s physical bravery—coming alone to the cell and engaging Xing Tian—demonstrates that strategists can be active allies willing to risk their safety for her.