Chapter 35 – Monday 21st October 2019: Public Shame and Private Grief

⚠️ Spoiler Warning: This guide contains detailed spoilers for the entire novel. Proceed only if you've finished reading or are comfortable knowing the plot.

Summary

Andy wakes to a cryptic text from an acquaintance and discovers a scathing article published about him titled “RIP Stand-Up Comedy.” The piece mocks his act, his appearance, and his career, calling him “dry, bland, fake and insubstantial.” He reads hundreds of comments, many of which echo the attack. Isolated by shame, Andy refuses to call his mother, Avi, or Emery for comfort, instead obsessing over Jen’s imagined reaction. He fears the article will confirm her decision to end their relationship. Emery eventually calls, advises silence, and offers to defend him publicly—but Andy declines, recognizing that he would do the same if the roles were reversed. Unable to write new material or sleep, he conflates the online abuse with his heartbreak, feeling that Jen could never love someone so publicly ridiculed.

Key Events

Andy sleeps through the “earthquake” of a viral article and wakes to a worried text from a comedian he barely knows.
He reads the full article (“RIP Stand-Up Comedy”) and its 789 comments, plus 456 Instagram comments.
He spirals into paranoia, even tracking down a school acquaintance who called him a “bell-end” and worrying about a carpet company’s like on that comment.
Andy rejects reaching out to his mother, Avi, or Emery out of pride and shame; he fixates solely on Jen.
Emery calls and gives pragmatic advice: say nothing, don’t post anything defensive or whiny.
Andy admits he would not defend a friend in the same situation, recognizing the toxicity of online shame.
He tries and fails to write new stand-up material, feeling creatively paralyzed.
Lying in bed, he conflates the online humiliation with his breakup, believing Jen’s rejection was inevitable given his public worthlessness.

Character Development

Andy Dawson

Andy’s internal crisis deepens. The online attack shatters his professional identity and amplifies his post-breakup insecurity. For the first time, he admits that his job feels trivial and that he has watched others suffer the same fate without intervening. His refusal to call anyone except Jen—whom he can’t contact—shows how the breakup has left him without a safe emotional anchor.

Emery

Emery appears as the only comedy friend who reaches out. He speaks with “paternal authority,” offering both sympathy and hard-nosed industry advice. His offer to publicly defend Andy, which Andy declines, underscores the tension between friendship and self-preservation in a ruthless field.

Jen (offstage)

Though physically absent, Jen dominates Andy’s thoughts. He imagines her reactions, her conversations with Seb, and her reading the article. The chapter suggests that Andy’s fear of Jen’s judgment is more painful than the article itself.

Themes, Symbols, or Motifs

The Hidden Wing / Secret Chamber

Andy describes discovering the article like “leaning too hard on a shelf in a library [that] opens to a secret chamber.” The metaphor captures the sudden, disorienting exposure of a hidden world of public opinion that was always there but invisible until triggered.

Fire and Ashes

The article’s own language (“earth to earth, ashes to ashes”) recurs in Andy’s feeling that the criticism is a funeral for his career. He later imagines the spreading comments as “a fire I can’t stop,” linking the viral shame to destruction beyond his control.

Toxic Waste / Asbestos

Andy calls himself “toxic waste” and “asbestos” in the eyes of social media. The motif of contagion emphasises how public shaming makes a person untouchable, even by friends.

Conflation of Public and Private Grief

Andy literally cannot separate the pain of the article from the pain of the breakup: “All my thoughts are muddled… Jen and the strangers online have become the same person.” This fusion drives the chapter’s emotional climax.

Why This Chapter Matters

Chapter 35 is a turning point in Andy’s arc. It externalises his internal self-doubt into a public shaming event, forcing him to confront his identity as a comedian and as a man Jen left. The chapter tests the strength of his friendships (Emery passes; others stay silent) and reveals the brutal mechanics of online culture, where a cruel article can dominate a person’s entire day—and self-worth. It also sets up a potential creative rebirth: Andy wants to “become new material,” but his voice is currently silenced by shame. This chapter plants the seed for his eventual reckoning with what he truly wants to say.

Study Questions and Answers

1. Why does Andy refuse to call his mother or Avi for support, and what does this reveal about his emotional state?
He avoids his mother to spare her worry, and he cannot bear Avi’s implied judgment that comedy is a waste of time. This reveals Andy’s deep shame about his career choice and his belief that those closest to him will use the article as evidence of his failure.

2. How does the article’s criticism relate to the themes of the novel so far, particularly Andy’s relationship with Jen?
The article calls Andy’s comedy “dry, bland, fake and insubstantial”—the same adjectives that could describe his emotional guardedness in the relationship. Andy himself connects the dots: the reason strangers mock him is the same reason Jen could not be with him. The public critique mirrors the private one.

3. What does Emery’s advice (“say nothing”) say about the culture of online comedy and friendship?
Emery knows that any response—funny or serious—will backfire. His advice reflects an unspoken code: in the age of viral shaming, silence is survival. Andy’s eventual admission that he wouldn’t defend a friend in the same situation shows how the culture forces even friends to stay quiet to avoid collateral damage.