Chapter 21 Summary: Heartbreaks and Kindred Spirits

⚠️ Spoiler Warning: This guide contains detailed spoilers for the entire novel. Proceed only if you've finished reading or are comfortable knowing the plot.

Summary

Cael and the group are in a rural village in the Philippines that was devastated by a hurricane. They help rebuild homes under the hot sun, while a nearby school serves children who lost family members. Cael feels unsettled, still affected by placing a candle in the River Ganges during their previous stop in Varanasi. Savannah notices his distance and offers support.

At the school, Cael spots a boy named Jacob sitting alone. Leo explains that Jacob’s older brother, Daniel, died saving him during the hurricane. Cael approaches Jacob and shares that he also lost an older brother, Cillian. They bond over their grief. Cael recalls Cillian teaching him to play hockey. Jacob shows Cael a shed with handmade hockey sticks left by a Canadian volunteer. Cael teaches Jacob how to hold a stick and sets up a makeshift game. Soon Dylan hands out sticks to the other children, and everyone joins in. Cael plays a competitive match with Leo and dominates, feeling a surge of joy he hasn’t felt in over a year. Savannah watches with tears in her eyes, and later on the beach, Cael laughs freely for the first time in months. He tells Savannah he might want to play hockey again, but needs more time. She supports him, and they share a moment of closeness before facing the upcoming retreat.

Key Events

Cael and the group arrive in a hurricane-stricken village in the Philippines to help rebuild.
Cael feels a lingering sadness from the Varanasi experience and struggles to articulate it to Savannah.
At the school, Cael notices Jacob, a boy who lost his brother in the hurricane.
Leo tells Cael that Daniel, Jacob’s older brother, died saving him.
Cael approaches Jacob and reveals that he, too, lost his older brother, Cillian.
Cael recalls a memory of Cillian taking him for fast food and expressing pride in him.
Jacob shows Cael a shed with handmade hockey sticks; Cael teaches Jacob to play.
Dylan and the other volunteers join the hockey game; Cael plays intensely and feels Cillian’s presence.
After the game, Cael leads Savannah to the beach, laughs, and admits he may want to play hockey again.
Savannah expresses her own anxiety about the upcoming exposure retreat.

Character Development

Cael takes a major step forward by voluntarily talking about Cillian to a stranger and re-engaging with hockey. Playing again gives him a visceral sense of his brother’s guidance. He moves from avoidance to cautious openness about his future.

Savannah shows unwavering patience and emotional attunement. She reads Cael’s moods, provides a safe space for him to share, and celebrates his small victories. Her belief that the energy of the dead remains near deepens their bond.

Jacob mirrors Cael’s earlier isolation. By the end of the chapter, he accepts Cael’s help and begins to participate, suggesting that connection can break through even the hardest grief.

Themes, Symbols, and Motifs

Hockey as a conduit for memory and healing: The wooden stick and the action of playing bring Cael back to Cillian’s teachings. The sport becomes a way to honor his brother.
Kindred spirits in grief: Cael and Jacob bond not over shared joy, but over shared loss. Their brother-less-ness connects them across age and culture.
Energy and presence: Savannah’s belief that “energy remains” after death gives Cael permission to feel Cillian with him during the game.
“Exposure” as a necessary pain: This leg of the trip forces participants to face grief head-on, a theme that will intensify in the coming retreat.
The beach scene: Water and sunset symbolize renewal. Cael’s laugh marks a release of pent-up sorrow, and his admission about hockey signals a tentative return to life.

Why This Chapter Matters

Chapter 21 marks a turning point for Cael. For the first time since Cillian’s death, he voluntarily plays hockey, shares a story about his brother, and allows himself to feel joy. His interaction with Jacob shows that helping others can be part of one’s own healing. The chapter also foreshadows the emotional intensity of the upcoming retreat and solidifies Cael and Savannah’s relationship as a source of strength.

Study Questions and Answers

1. How does Cael’s interaction with Jacob mirror his own grief journey? Cael sees in Jacob a reflection of his own isolated mourning. Jacob sits apart, unable to join the other children, just as Cael has been unable to re-engage with hockey or his community. By reaching out and teaching Jacob to hold a stick, Cael practices the same compassion he wishes he had received—and in doing so, begins to heal himself.

2. What role does Savannah play in Cael’s progress during this chapter? Savannah serves as a quiet anchor. She notices his distraction, asks gentle questions, and physically stays by his side. At the beach, she validates his feelings about Cillian’s presence, and when he expresses uncertainty about hockey, she offers unconditional acceptance. Her belief in him helps him voice his own tentative hopes.

3. Why is the beach scene significant for Cael? The beach represents a release. After dominating the hockey game, Cael is emotionally raw but lighter. He laughs wholeheartedly for the first time since Cillian’s death. The water washing over him feels cleansing. His confession that he might want to play again—though he is not ready—shows that he is no longer rejecting his old identity entirely. The sunset and warm waves create a sacred space where he can imagine a future.